Look where L L Bean advises you to keep your phones and gadgets!

They're such trusting souls, storing their gadgets outside their backpacks for the whole world to steal. No wonder this is probably the worst complaint we've ever gotten about L.L. Bean. They're obviously just too nice. Good for them.

We know shipping accidents happen, but what's unacceptable about J.Crew's response is how they keep putting Kimberly off instead of working with her to resolve the problem.

My credit card was charged on the day of purchase for the full amount of my order. When I first called on the 8th the rep had suggested for me to wait the full 7 days, I did not have a problem then with the wait. On the 11th I checked their website and noticed the aforementioned status change that led to another call immediately.

I was refunded $49.99 on the same day on the item that was supposedly returned but I never received, but their rep did not even want to look up my address to see whether or not it was sent to the wrong address. When I insisted that he check, he told me that they had the correct shipping address but I should wait 10 days to call back anyways.

It's not like Kim's a novice shopper who doesn't know how shipping works. Now the question is: is there anyone at J.Crew who knows how shipping works? You two should talk.

Two Fridays ago I filed a Better Business Bureau complaint against Dell because they ignored my repeated cries to please remove me from their catalog mailing list, and today I got this following message from Dell's corporate office (listen here). The nice lady says she located my address and is removing it from their system. This is redundant as some other Dell execs say they've finally got my address removed but it does show that filing a BBB complaint does work for getting Dell to promise to stop sending you junk mail (we'll have to see what the mail man brings, or rather, doesn't bring, to know whether it worked completely). Here's where you can go to easily file one online.

(Photo: What Rhymes With Nicole)

UPDATE: After drafting this post, I re-emailed the Dell execs who said they would help me. One of them wrote back to say that these May catalogs are the last I will get. He says that I spoke with him back in March, they had already missed the May cuttoff because they process the files far in advance. We'll see what the mailman brings next month.

PREVIOUSLY: Dell Won't Stop Sending Me Catalogs So I'm Burning Them

Sadly for Lampert, the most shoppers "discovered" Kmart stores were dirty, understocked, and oddly overpriced.

The latest old idea that Lampert is going to make new again may be the "Sears catalog." The Chicago Tribune seems to think that its an old idea that may actually save Sears:

"If you think about what the Big Book originally tried to do, it was to open up all this stuff to people living in the cabins in the Plains, and that's essentially what they're doing," said e-commerce guru Bill Bass, who ran Sears' online business before Lampert took control of Sears in 2005. Bass currently is co-founder and CEO of Fair Indigo, a fair-trade direct merchant of clothing. "When you think about the power of the Internet, that's what it's really good at."

Brand expert Jonathan Salem Baskin is one who sees the potential. He outlined his self-described radical idea for saving Sears on his blog, envisioning Sears.com as "a gateway to whatever is hot." He suggests Sears host branded boutiques from vendors around the world. Its 3,500-store base could shrink and function as a place Americans can go to pick up or exchange merchandise.

"Talk about a rich heritage," said Baskin, president of Baskin Associates Inc., a Chicago-based brand consulting firm. "Like anything, it would take some commitment. Why couldn't Sears bring the world to me?"

How is Sears doing these days? Are they still having major problem with their repair division? Tell us at tips@consumerist.com, and put "Sears" in the subject. Remember: We love pictures.

Sears: Virtual approach to a vintage retailing idea [Chicago Tribune]
(Photo:I na aina e )

In addition, I used to receive catalogs from Dell Home and Home Office but they honored my unsubscribe requests. Obviously whoever is running the small biz catalogs is not doing their job right. It's my hope that this series of beautiful and seemingly childish gestures might possibly prompt Dell to investigate the matter. If it results people's unsubscribe requests actually get honored, then I will have saved more trees by burning this catalog then if I recycled it. It's just a hunch, but somehow I don't think simply placing the catalog in the recycle bin will have the same effect as my direct marketing pyre.

Catalog Choice [via Stay Free!]

PREVIOUSLY: Getting Off Mailing Lists Is Fun
(Photo: Getty)

Yeah, we've done business with all these guy guys before, but guess what? We don't want their mail.

Here's the results of our battles. You may be surprised at who was the hardest to deal with!

DELL: Relatively painless, but with a hold time of 5 min.

Movies Unlimited: Quick and easy.

Tempurpedic : Sales rep picked up right away, passed us right off to a customer service rep. She tried to look us up but couldn't find our phone number. Found us after we gave our name. Sounded really bored and condescending but we tried to disarm her by being super-nice and ignoring the disdain in her voice.

Guitar Center: Easey-Peasy.

New School: Number was hidden. We called the number that said, "call this number to request getting on our catalog mailing list." The guy told us to send in the mailing address label to a certain address. We asked him if there wasn't a number we could call. Cagily, he provided it, but it only lead to an answering machine.

Dentist's Office: They've been sending coupons to our apartment building addressed to RESIDENT. They tried to convince us that these coupons didn't exist, that they weren't on them, or the coupons were in some kind of Valu-Pack. They then tried to tell us that the coupons were being sent to the building, not me. We told them that they only showed up after we visited them, so they obviously had sold our address to somewhere. The secretary said that they don't have a list and don't send out coupons. We asked her if they didn't know who was doing their own marketing for them. The secretary said she would take down our info and "try" to see if she could "get in touch" with "whoever" was doing the mailing. We told her, no, you will not try, you WILL get us off the mailing list, consider this a formal request and get us off or we will report you to the FTC, we're saying, but that's just how it is, have a good day. CLICK.

Yep, if we were to file a complaint about a company not honoring our request to get off their mailing list, we would go to this FTC complaint form.

(Photo: The BrassPotato)

When two get forwarded from her old address, it can be as many as four of the same catalog.

Several months ago, she decided to spend call up all ten of the catalog companies and request removal. Of the ten, six are still sending catalogs, despite all of them agreeing to have her address removed in weeks.

Companies that removed their names:

• Company Store
• Art.com
• JJill
• Boden USA

Companies that did not remove their names:

• JCrew
• Tiffanys
• Anthropologie
• Pottery Barn
• Urban Outfitters
• Crate and Barrel

Beyond scribbling "Return To Sender" on 'em, what else can one do? There's services like GreenDimes and 41pounds, but it's ridiculous that consumers should have to pay to get removed from lists they didn't agree to be on in the first place. Even registering for the "Do Not Contact" Direct Marketing Association list will cost you a dollar...

Deb writes:

— BEN POPKEN

The Target: People who have bought tools online from Amazon before, or the current resident.

The Models: Although there are exceptions that may also prove out our subconcious homosexuality, like the tight pair of jeans wielding the Black & Decker 18-Volt Cordless Broom, this catalog is heavy with musky, khaki-wearing white men. There is a black family on page 22, making up two of the four pictures in the Rubbermaid section. We could not tie that into a Jeffersons joke, which is probably for the best.

Bathroom Reading Rating: The Multi Tools page shows a strength that is missing from the rest of the catalog, diddling our fundamental male urge to purchase swords by the dozen. Other sections are bland, with product images shot in a white box with little context to show their use. The text overweighs the images. It's a lot like Amazon.com, actually.

Its blasé design compounds its fundamental shortcoming: reading this in the bathroom makes it nearly impossible to actually order anything. In fact, seeing this catalog did little more than reminds us that, "Oh yeah, Amazon sells tools." Do we really need a whole catalog when just a flyer would suffice?

As it says right on the busy, uninspired front cover: "See website for details."

One Dremel Cordless Pet Nail Grooming Kits out of five. As fun as printing email.

The Target: Cooks, ostensibly. More likely, those who like to eat food prepared by cooks on nice china or are enticed by the prospect of 'six months of cheese.'

The Models: Entirely bereft of human faces, with only an occasional hand model to clutch firmly the stainless steel food mills and potato ricers. Thankfully, these hands are well manicured and do not suggest the tiniest amount of human skin or nail has escaped into the fruitcake.

Bathroom Reading Rating: Like the edelweiss, the layout is clean and bright. The unfortunate choice of placing the foodstuffs at the front of the book leaves us somewhat uncomfortable in suggesting the catalog be positioned for restroom reading.

Context, here, is king. If your home is festooned with the hot, freshly-pressed paninis and bay leaf garlands offered by the catalog, it would be gauche to let slip which company has provided inspiration. On the other hand, if you've recently upgraded to buying meals from "the good Chinese delivery," there's no need to remind your guests (and yourself) of what a horrible homemaker you are.

Three caramel-nut chocolate sticky paws out of five. Save it for the bedroom.

The Target: Women who want their oaken headboards distressed, but their table lamps bouncing soft light off minimalist gauchos to be tear-dropped and unblemished.

The Models: Three-fifths, by weight, of the girls we knew next door. In Elf City. The redhead, relegated to the back of the book, is stunning.

Bathroom Reading Rating: The layout is unassumingly composited; the photography is interesting; the paper is soft, with a chalky cover that lends itself to languid browsing (or emergency shortages). Suitable for women and guys who would like to impress them, without being totally gay.

Four swallowtail floor cushions out of five. A keeper.