Comments for Ok, Someone Should Have Thought This VeggieTales Cookie Cutter Through

Ok, Someone Should Have Thought This VeggieTales Cookie Cutter Through

2009-10-10T05:53:59Z

Reader Aaron was in his local Christian bookstore when he found something, um, interesting. It's a VeggieTales cookie cutter, right? Let's all stop for a moment and think about this.

Ok, now that we've considered it carefully, let's hear what Aaron has to say:

So I walked into my local Christian bookstore the other day, just to kill time while at the mall, and I see a rack displaying various Veggitales products. Having once worked in a church nursery, I know of the magical powers contained in those anthropomorphic carrots and cauliflowers. Imagine my surprise when I see this SEEMINGLY innocuous cookie cutter.

Innocent looking at first...but with a simple 90� rotation.....

What the deuce? Will someone please think of the children!

/satirical rant

This is just multitasking. It's perfect for your kids AND perfect for bachelorette parties. It's all about the frosting. Ya know?

Comment from pz on 2009-10-16

2009-10-17T00:45:43Z

@Daedalus454: Catholics and other Anglicans, aye.

However, Anglicans typically believe in "Real Presence" -- that the crackers and port wine aren't literally turning into the flesh and blood of Christ, but are somehow representative on a higher level than something that's merely symbolic.

Kinda like a Walt Whitman "every atom that belongs to you" kind of way, I guess.

Comment from Daedalus454 on 2009-10-16

2009-10-17T00:08:20Z

@El_Fez: No. What you are referring to is called Transubstantiation, the belief that the crackers and grape juice are literally transforming into flesh and blood as you ingest them. Catholics are, to my knowledge, the only "big" group that believes this. Most Protestants are perfectly OK with the crackers and grape juice *symbolizing* Christ's suffering.

Comment from dohtem on 2009-10-16

2009-10-16T23:47:24Z

@diasdiem: Awesome!

Comment from Skunky on 2009-10-16

2009-10-16T22:35:01Z

@Duke_Newcombe (now with 50% more feigned interest): Yeah, I can only propel myself a few yards at most after lunch at the Indian buffet.

Comment from Skunky on 2009-10-16

2009-10-16T22:30:15Z

@BumpinUgglas: Lighthouses are used as symbolism referring to the guiding light of Christ, actually. So naturally, everyone follows around the large, erect, pulsing light.

Comment from theblackdog on 2009-10-13

2009-10-13T19:44:25Z

@nybiker: Or Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls

Comment from axiomatic on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T21:36:40Z

Veggie Tales is most decidedly Christian. I find this penis shaped cookie cutter perfectly indicative of a great deal of Christian (specifically Catholic) people.

This one toy embodies everything hypocritical about American Christianity today.

Am I reading too much in to this toy? Most definitely! Am I enjoying it still? Doubly so!

Comment from JerNor on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T20:40:04Z

Here's another one that slipped by:
[tinyurl.com]
Peas & firehose, good combo, yes?

Comment from BumpinUgglas on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T20:10:39Z

@Tvhargon: Again, painful biopsy.

Comment from BumpinUgglas on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T20:08:54Z

@FDCPAGuy: No, it's worse, unless lighthouses have some sort of Christian undertone that I'm unaware of...

Comment from kaceetheconsumer on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T18:53:09Z

@canuck: We have those same rules. I don't care how innocuous Veggie Tales seems...my husband and I are firmly agreed that religion should be approached from a point of intelligence and wisdom, with many questions being asked, not early indoctrination even if it's passive and comes with catchy songs. In fact, catchy songs make it worse as far as we're concerned.

I've got multiple bibles, a book of Mormon, a Bhagavad Gita, and tons of other religious books in this house. My daughter is welcome to read any of them when she's able and then I'll take her to any religious institution within driving distance that will let her come ask questions (I've already been looking for kid-friendly local Buddhism but haven't found it yet...she's into Buddha as an icon she's seen in a couple places and wants to know more).

If others choose to use Veggie Tales, that's their business, but it's firmly not allowed in our house. We prefer "Here Comes Science" for indoctrination purposes! :D

Comment from mandys08 on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T18:25:04Z

i wonder if this is sold on amazon... seems like i found a nice filler item. last week i used a 4 pack of easter cookie cutters.

Comment from AngryK9 on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T05:56:50Z

@Flyersfan: Most women love the sticky white kind.

Comment from AngryK9 on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T05:55:51Z

@KMan13 still wants a Pontiac G8: Apparently, you have never heard of the word "context"

Comment from tolldog on 2009-10-12

2009-10-12T05:42:47Z

Having worked for Big Idea (makers of VeggieTales) for a few years at the beginning of my career, I find this really really funny.

When I was there, the company was about 200 or so odd people with 5+ people responsible for developing items like this for sale. That's right, all products like that were designed in house at a company that small. They wanted control over everything.

Fast forward several years, one bankruptcy court, two parent company changes and several layoffs later, this is what you get. Cheap products made without thinking.

Why would any kid want a cookie shaped like the company logo (which is what Larry and Bob are, when standing like that)? It would make much more sense as seperate cookie cutters (and, you could charge more!)

Fail all around. Maybe they can work that into some upcoming story...

Comment from EtherealFlame on 2009-10-11

2009-10-11T13:12:12Z

@foofish: That makes two of us. I just thought they were closed sundays because they were lazy. I don't care if they worship the flying spagetti monster to be honest, I like that store. So do my walls. Bank account though, not so much.

Comment from pyehac on 2009-10-11

2009-10-11T10:35:30Z

Everyone here has dirty minds!

Comment from leastcmplicated on 2009-10-11

2009-10-11T07:08:09Z

Family Christian Bookstore has them. its free with purchase of a VeggieTales movie, something about christmas and u get a free veggietales CD... a friend of mine will buy the video offa me, and she also has borrowing rights to the cookie cutter lol

Comment from lalaland13 on 2009-10-11

2009-10-11T06:43:14Z

@catastrophegirl: The only game in town is Books-a-Million, and honestly, the peppering of Christian stuff throughout the store is a bit annoying. Seems way more prevalent that at places like Barnes and Noble.

But they also have plenty of novels with sexin, and even a tiny gay/feminist/whatnot section. So they definitely have a Christian slant, but I just try to ignore it in favor of the heathen stuff. They are based in Birmingham, Ala., which I'm sure is part of it.

Comment from mariospants on 2009-10-11

2009-10-11T06:33:34Z

After years of putting up with backwards religious zealots gleefully pointing out subliminal messages in advertising and media, one might think they've wised up. Can someone please launch a campaign lambasting the company that owns the Veggie Tales to expose the mind-altering, childhood-destroying porn seller it really is? You know, similar to the way they attack video games, television and advertising?

Comment from Scudder on 2009-10-10

2009-10-11T03:24:23Z

Looks more like a cock-ie cutter to me.

Comment from takotchi on 2009-10-10

2009-10-11T00:25:58Z

@MooseOfReason: Other than the um, stem of the tomato, and the er, unfortunate size ratio of the cucumber to the tomato... it does indeed look like "something else".

Comment from HogwartsAlum on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T23:33:58Z

@maruawe42: Relax. It's funny. LAUGH; you'll live longer!

Comment from HogwartsAlum on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T23:31:42Z

@MostlyHarmless: We have Michael's here also and they ARE open on Sunday. They have a lot of the same stuff, but HL is bigger.

I like Hobby Lobby. I go there a lot.

Comment from HogwartsAlum on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T23:30:23Z

@catastrophegirl: I know...my first thought was "Run to the big Christian bookstore and see if it's there!"

Comment from HogwartsAlum on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T23:29:15Z

@GuinevereRucker: No way...the gutter is too much fun.

Comment from foofish on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T22:29:59Z

@bohemian: How did I never know Hobby Lobby was religious? They have nice yarn!

Comment from scouts honor on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T22:26:32Z

@maruawe42: Lighten up, Francis.

Comment from Fujikopez on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T22:17:08Z

@aaron8301: Yeah, I know...it's an inside joke from a group of friends, and I couldn't resist posting it.

Comment from Moosehawk on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T21:45:52Z

@mythago: *whoosh* Hold on, let's dumb it down a little bit then

LOL VEGETABLES CUTTIN' COOKIES.

Comment from maruawe42 on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T20:35:53Z

This is revolting. people make something innocent like this into something else. If you have a nasty mind anything can be visualized as something nasty.. A perversion of the mind is a wasteful thing, surely a child or a normal person would have difficulty seeing this as this perverted person has seen it. I am all for child protection,but extremist are always looking in the wrong direction to help with child protection.......

Comment from mythago on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T20:07:07Z

@dbshaw: Snarkiness is better when it's funny and pointed.

Comment from thepassenger on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T19:47:37Z

@MostlyHarmless: Same with those Franklin Covey stores.

Comment from dbshaw on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T19:21:26Z

@mythago: And I'm guess you don't know snarkiness is.

Comment from VeeKaChu on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T19:11:49Z

@ovalseven:Not to go to off-topic, but in a similar "Oops, that's not very well thought-through" marketing vein, I give you this Intercontinental Commodities Exchange- the "ICE" market- advertisment.

Subsequent offerings had the border that comprises the faux-"L" in an off color.

[images46.fotki.com]

Comment from mythago on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:26:57Z

@MostlyHarmless: Someday that will make an employees' lawyer very happy.

Comment from mythago on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:26:02Z

@canuck: Yeah, I'm baffled too. Because....they're not as adorable as Elmo? There are a few episodes that are specifically Christian, but most VT is about stuff like "be nice to other people" and "don't obsess on having expensive things".

Comment from mythago on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:24:39Z

@dbshaw: You don't know what VeggieTales is, I'm guessing.

Comment from katstermonster on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:14:40Z

@diasdiem: Yeah, that they said. Hahaha.

Comment from katstermonster on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:14:02Z

@canuck: Usually I'm against perky kid's TV shows that try to teach a lesson, but I have to say that Veggie Tales are a different breed. They're really bizarre and hilarious, I always had fun watching them when I was babysitting. They throw in some jokes that go over the kiddies' heads, which is always a good time.

Comment from katstermonster on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:12:11Z

@MostlyHarmless: I was too blown away (heh, heh) by how awesome it was to come up with anything good.

Comment from Telekinesis123 on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T18:06:11Z

@nstonep: No it sucked.

Comment from KMan13 still wants a Pontiac G8 on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T15:22:26Z

@GuinevereRucker: apparently, you saw genitals, too, or else you wouldn't have said that ;) ... nowhere in the article did it mention genitals.

Comment from nstonep on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T12:52:13Z

The consumerist must be 11 years old and get a kick out of such jokes. Let me guess...made in china ;)

PS-->You know my joke was better.

Comment from Homerjay is utterly alone. on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T11:21:46Z

@canuck: Why??

Comment from subtlefrog on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T11:17:00Z

"Someone should have thought this cookie cutter through."

Oh, I think they did, Meg. I think they did.

Comment from silver-bolt on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T11:00:42Z

@El_Fez: Except they wrote the playbook. Donner just stole, err, copyright infringed upon it.

Comment from GuinevereRucker on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T10:41:25Z

@canuck: I love VT, they rock :) Some catchy tunes too. My wife and I like them even though they're aimed at kids.

PS People that see genitals in everything need to get their minds out of the gutter. It's a freakin' cookie cutter.

Comment from catastrophegirl on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T10:24:55Z

@kalaratri: on weekends they hang out with [consumerist.com]

Comment from diasdiem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:58:28Z

@aaron8301: The cockenballs?

Comment from diasdiem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:57:20Z

@aaron8301: You tell 'im, aaron8301! :-)

Comment from diasdiem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:55:14Z

@G.O.B.: Come on!: You mean The Origin of the Species ?

Comment from bitsnbytes on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:34:28Z

I didn't know Beavis and Butthead were writing for Consumerist these days.

Comment from FDCPAGuy on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:29:52Z

@aaron8301:
Ah the good ol' Adam Sandler - do it for your mama skit. I'd post the audio here but I don't think the consumerist gods would be forgiving.

Comment from Alys Brangwin can't stop the beat on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:21:23Z

@MostlyHarmless: "for worship and family time" or so the sign on the one my mom dragged me to said

Comment from G.O.B.: Come on! on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:20:10Z

@EyeintheLAsky: Come on!

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:16:59Z

*Bit, BIT, I SAY! The Adam Sandler BIT!

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:16:37Z

@MooseOfReason: If you're male, you shouldn't need a class to look down and go "yeah, yeah it kinda does look like that!"

If you're female, well, redtube.

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:15:22Z

This gives me a mental image of the Adam Sandler but about the kids and the mom around the pool in the backyard...

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:13:46Z

@Fujikopez: Day late and a buck short, someone already beat you to it, and did a better job at that.

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:13:18Z

@EyeintheLAsky: I had the same though. "But there's only one test-er, um, tomato!"

Comment from PølάrβǽЯ on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:10:31Z

@diasdiem: COTD +1

Comment from FDCPAGuy on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T09:04:43Z

@DPGumby: @Chinchillazilla:
My MIL is the manager of the local christian book store in my town I will see if I can source a few of these for you folks.

Comment from El_Fez on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:56:57Z

@Spider Jerusalem: wouldn't that be cannibalism? I mean, I guess there are CERTAIN Christian sects that traffic in that, but...yeah.

Don't ALL Christians practice cannibalism, symbolically or otherwise? That whole "Eat this bread, it is my body. Drink this wine, it is my blood" stuff is right out of the Donner Party playbook.

Comment from MostlyHarmless on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:55:11Z

@Kimaroo - No Stars Upon Thars: Yeah the first time I went into one, I saw a sign on the door effectively saying: "We are closed on Sundays, so our employees can go to church."

Comment from MostlyHarmless on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:51:50Z

@katstermonster: Man! I cant believe I missed this thread! And now I am too tired to make any innuendo laced comments. Fark.

Comment from Tvhargon on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:45:56Z

@brainswarm: Maybe he did mean bob

Comment from MooseOfReason on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:41:07Z

It looks like a gun, at the most.

Really, if you think it looks like something else, you should go back to Sex-Ed class.

Comment from Fujikopez on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:32:47Z

If you want to touch my tomato
If you want to make me smile...

Comment from EyeintheLAsky on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:25:56Z

uh, okay...maybe we could re-brand it the "Lance Armstrong" cookie-cutter.

C'mon, work with me here, people...

Comment from nybiker on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:19:51Z

@magic8ball: And those cookies are better with rum balls.

Comment from Telekinesis123 on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:13:17Z

They did think it through, all too well.

Comment from G.O.B.: Come on! on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:05:58Z

@catastrophegirl: ROFL @ "Christian Fiction"

Comment from brainswarm on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:04:13Z

@G.O.B.: Come on!: Larry is the cucumber, not Bob.

Comment from Kimaroo - 100% Pure Natural Kitteh on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T08:02:14Z

@magic8ball: I try not to think of penis of any kind when I'm with my mother.. that's just how I like to do things, personally.

(I like a good penis joke as much as the next girl.. but the line is drawn with the parents!)

Comment from magic8ball on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:54:30Z

@Kimaroo - No Stars Upon Thars: "I can't watch Veggie Tales ... without thinking of PENIS COOKIES."

You say that like it's a bad thing.

Comment from Michael Belisle on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:52:15Z

@bohemian: I spent some time in a Hobby Lobby recently. Something did seem off about it, but I assumed that was just because I wasn't into their kind hobbies. (Hey, umm, do you have any servos anywhere? Or model rockets? What kind of a hobby store is this?)

Comment from Kimaroo - 100% Pure Natural Kitteh on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:51:39Z

@bohemian: Um... as far as I know Hobby Lobby doesn't hide it:

[www.hobbylobby.com]

Comment from cameronl on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:50:04Z

@diasdiem: I like 'em, too. I had assumed it was your typical lame, preachy christian cartoon until my son brought one home from the library. Actually quite funny, and they understand that they need to entertain first, teach second. And they know when to take a break from the teaching and just be plain fun.

The two creators are great movie and comedy buffs. It's apparent in their work, and definitely obvious in the commentary tracks on the DVDs. Really great stuff.

Comment from Kimaroo - 100% Pure Natural Kitteh on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:44:45Z

Now hold on just a gosh darn minute there, Consumerist.

Because of YOU I can never grocerie shop the same way AGAIN.

[consumerist.com]

And NOW.. I can't watch Veggie Tales with my mother (because she likes it, and I think they're funny.) without thinking of PENIS COOKIES.

What the heck?!!

Comment from bohemian on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:37:02Z

I want that cookie cutter. I might even consider darkening the door of the local Christian bookstore to find one.

Comment from bohemian on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:36:22Z

@catastrophegirl: Uh. I loathe retailers that try to do a sort of bait and switch by pretending they are not religious but then peppering it all over the store. Hobby Lobby is the same way.

Comment from Chinchillazilla on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:33:13Z

@DPGumby: @DPGumby: I need this.

Comment from Darkest Daze on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:32:46Z

@ovalseven: If Veggie Tales wasn't Christian, that logo would definitely be so much better than this cookie cutter

Comment from missdona on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:15:12Z

@DPGumby: If you buy the video, you get one free.

[www.cedarspringsskinny.com]

Comment from kalaratri on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:01:27Z

I also like the fact that it's Bob and Larry as the suspicious cookie cutter, adding a nice subtle touch of homosexual innuendo.

Comment from DPGumby on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T07:00:29Z

So, I just spent 15 minutes trying to find this and can not. Anyone found an online retailer for it? I would like two of them. ;)

Comment from SpiderPaintingDollarz cleaned his room on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:57:56Z

I have a dancing Larry (the cucumber) that I got somewhere (don't ask, I've had very interesting nights out). Come to think of it. It seems more like an adult toy now. Gag gift for the girlfriend? (Get it, gag gift?)

Anyone else hear crickets?

Comment from Spider Jerusalem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:55:09Z

@dbshaw: wouldn't that be cannibalism? I mean, I guess there are CERTAIN Christian sects that traffic in that, but...yeah.

"We're veggies! Eat our brothers!"

Hell naw:

"Carrot juice is murder, bishes! Eat a cookie!"

Comment from catastrophegirl on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:43:57Z

i need to go see if the books a million has this. i need one. if i let the sugar cookies get a little extra golden brown...
[they don't call themselves a christian bookstore on the sign... but they are: [www.flickr.com] ]

Comment from MsFeasance on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:39:53Z

@diasdiem: Comment of the day.

Comment from ovalseven on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:39:25Z

That reminds me of the OGC logo.

[www.ogc.gov.uk]

Rotate it 90 degrees to the right.

[i.telegraph.co.uk]

Comment from G.O.B.: Come on! on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:38:30Z

@Duke_Newcombe (now with 50% more feigned interest): You knockin' fart jokes, brah'?

Comment from Duke_Newcombe sees what you did there... on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:33:24Z

...cause you can only get so much mileage out of fart joke, eh kids?

Comment from G.O.B.: Come on! on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:25:32Z

1. Put a little bit of vanilla frosting on Bob's head.
2. Rotate 90 degrees.

Comment from Flyersfan on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:24:20Z

Wife just said, "It's all about the frosting."

Not sure which way she was going with that...

Comment from diasdiem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:23:12Z

@canuck: My sister lets her 2 1/2 year old son watch Veggie Tales, and he really likes them. I actually kinda like them, even as an inveterate agnostic. They seem less obnoxious than other Christian programming.

Comment from evilmage on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:21:35Z

@diasdiem: +1.

Comment from diasdiem on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:17:45Z

If you like to f**k with tomatoes,
If a squash can make you smile,
If you like to molest the potatoes
Up and down the produce aiiiiiisle....

HAVE WE GOT A SHOW FOR YOU!

Comment from canuck on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:17:24Z

i love this cookie cutter! i personally detest veggie tales... in fact i had strict rules as to what my daughter could watch on tv as a child:

1. no violence or nudity
2. no veggie tales

there may have been other rules in there somewhere, but these were the most important ones.

Comment from Coles_Law on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:12:21Z

@FDCPAGuy: I don't know. If someone gave me one of these cookies, I'd spend a good half hour trying to figure out where to take the first bite.

Comment from dbshaw on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:09:29Z

First off, ignoring the obvious, isn't like an oxymoron in action? A VeggieTales Cookie Cutter!? Why not a VeggieTales broccoli steamer? Or a crudités dish?

Secondly and perhaps more alarming, since this took place in a christian bookstore, wouldn't talking veggies, especially those that come in that titillating form be the devil's work? Clearly someone in that store's ordering dept. is a wiccan.

Comment from Thricebanned on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:05:32Z

@Several: Prolly just a skin tag.

Comment from katstermonster on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:05:27Z

This. Is. So. Awesome.

Comment from FDCPAGuy on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:04:22Z

no where near as bad as the gummy lighthouses...

Comment from SagarikaLumos on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:03:59Z

@Several: Whew yuck, I concur.

Comment from Several on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T06:00:58Z

I'm no doctor, but that little bump underneath might need a very painful biopsy.

Comment from yume_ryuu on 2009-10-10

2009-10-10T05:56:42Z

Haha, funny.