![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-929652-100x100.png\")
All that effort for ONE sex toy? Man, his significant other must really be begging for some more excitement in the bedroom...
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-176865-100x100.png\")
@Bogart's Falcon aka Philly Falcon: Furthermore, the article doesn’t specify what type of sex toy he purchased. Maybe it was the deluxe blow-up sheep instead of the platinum edition.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-348208-100x100.png\")
This must be one of those unusual sexual urges those medication commercials warn about.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-161207-100x100.png\")
Man the video is so much funnier than I thought it would be... forgetting to put the car in park is hilarious.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-849514-100x100.png\")
@aphex242: I wonder how he's going to feel when he realizes that it's going to cost him more to repair the damage to his car, not to mention the store and possibly attorney fees, than it would've to purchase the damned toy.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1237672-100x100.png\")
@Bogart's Falcon aka Philly Falcon: Maybe he was just way too embarrassed to buy the toy so he thought this would be more incognito.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/css/images/default.gif\")
@aphex242: I disagree. Keeping it in drive let the car drive up to the exit door while he shopped, shaving valuable seconds.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1175017-100x100.png\")
@henrygates: This is probably why it's on consumerist in the first place, to prove that consumers can think ahead of big corp and take matters into their own hands.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1263041-100x100.png\")
@mazzic1083: I agree. That is one way to avoid ATM withdrawal fees from big impersonal national corporate banks -- drive in one door of the bank, make a withdrawal, drive out the other door.
Hard times in this economy.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1295701-100x100.png\")
If you're desperate enough to drive through a store to get a sexy toy, how are you not greedy enough to grab more than one thing?
@hoi-polloi: \"to get a sexy toy\" totally came off as sounding like Borat-speak in my mind over here. Much appreciated for the laugh!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-605040-100x100.png\")
What porn shop is not open 24/7? I must be spoiled living in NYC.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-665956-100x100.png\")
@itiswhatitis:
I'm proud to say I have no ideas what hours are porn shops are open here.
I do know that the internet is always open for business, though.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-321187-100x100.png\")
Best use of a tag by Consumerist ever.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-851357-100x100.png\")
Whatever happened to the ancient art of making your own sex toys?
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-429538-100x100.png\")
On one hand this is truly terrible and awful due to the damage caused, but on the other this is just !@#$ing hilarious as can be.
Kinda makes Quizno's lame by comparison...
>The thief remains at large.
Yeah, but HOW large?
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-460777-100x100.png\")
What ever happened to good old fashioned shop lifting?
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-956386-100x100.png\")
\"Maybe he was embarrassed,\" said the regional supervisor, who identified himself only as Mike. \"What a perverted idiot.\"
Quote of the year!!! lol
@usagi32211: Yeah, but I can imagine a guy getting a dildo in this fashion because they're too embarrassed to buy it.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1020806-100x100.png\")
@ballistic90:
I agree- if he stole it, it's at least a bit more \"manly\" than going in and buying it with his hard-earned money. Not only that, but there's no record of any transaction whatsoever.
As clever as any stupid dolt can get, I guess.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-298926-100x100.png\")
Dumbass. That's all there is to this.
I met someone at my uni who had a warrant out for stealing a dildo. She apparently had been holding it in the sex shop, and just walked out without realizing it was still in her hand. Once she realized she was holding it outside the shop she just threw it away. Doesn't make much sense to me why she didn't bring it back in and explain the situation in that case though.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-505944-100x100.png\")
I am anticipating this clip showing up on 'World's Dumbest Criminals' before long.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-441571-100x100.png\")
is this guy not aware you can buy sex toys online and have them delivered... to your door. very discreet.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-944482-100x100.png\")
Is it really worth all the effort (and probably all the car damage he did on his car) for it? I guess to this guy it is.
Was that Elwood Blues driving? Didn't he do the same thing in a mall in Chi-town? Crappy 1995 Neon too.
@AllanG54: He was probably thinking:
\"It's 106 miles to Chicago, I've got a full tank of gas, a half a pack of cigarettes, a $300 sexy toy, it's dark and I'm wearing sunglasses.\"
I'm originally from the area and was in town visiting this weekend. The store has a huge sign in front stating that they are, in fact, open. Ah, Ohio.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-159929-100x100.png\")
I love that he probably did $30,000 worth of damage to the building to steal a $300 sex toy.
I so wanted the car to exit the back doors all on its own with him chasing after it - rubber boobies and all.
What is a $300 sex toy like?
He just HAD to be ashamed to go in and buy it.
He either did FAR more $$ damage to his car OR he risked stealing a car for the heist.
Either way BUYING it is much cheaper.
OK, I will ask the obvious question nobody else seems to have asked: What kinds of sex toys cost $300? And what kind did he steal?
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-413348-100x100.png\")
@sashazur: The only stuff I have seen that expensive is the toys molded after a female porn stars parts. I can't imagine who spends that though. I can't imagine it's that much better than pleasuring your self. Get some lube or lotion of you want it to be special, that has to be a cheaper better alternative to doing 30K in damage to a store and likely facing jail time.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-104871-100x100.png\")
ok... what particular item was he after?
If you suffer from an erection that lasts more than 4 hours please immediately drive your car into the adult store to seek relief.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1304928-100x100.png\")
I bet the damage to the car would be more than $300, too bad stupid people don't think things through
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-436584-100x100.png\")
I've heard of the devil going down to Georgia but here is proof that the devil also goes down in your pants.
What the hell?
Why not just go in during daylight hours and shoplift? Much less of a crime, and I doubt the clerk would do anything.
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-258324-100x100.png\")
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-131723-100x100.png\")
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-436259-100x100.png\")
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-1034061-100x100.png\")
Good thing I wasnt drinking anything when I read this.
Also, I would date Michelle Bachmann for a klondike bar.
@MostlyHarmless:
talking about klondike bars. How many people ask for them on there last meal.
@MostlyHarmless: I didn't know who she was so I Googled her.
Jesus, you must really want that ice cream bar.
@MostlyHarmless: I'd go out with Bjork for a Klondike Bar
@MostlyHarmless: Would you date Nancy Grace for a Klondike bar?
An no, you don't get to tape her mouth shut.
@MostlyHarmless: A Klondike and $7,000 and I'll date Hillary Clinton. But only if it is limited to one hour.
@MostlyHarmless: Guuuuh really? I couldn't do it, even if I were into girls.