"...You can cough up a hairball/and no one will m-i-n-d..."
"Dogs will be shown no mercy/They'll be shipped to New Jersey."

But do you have a Hall of Justice?

Thus, the only thing standing between our civilization and complete (human) ruin is Ben Popken and a feather-toy dangling from a string.

While I appreciate it's difficult to understand the weight such responsibility must be (and who besides Ben can?), have the simple human decency to thank him for saving us all, even if it means perhaps a few less Consumerist articles written by his hand. OK?

(Oh, and Captain, if you're reading this? I make really good oatmeal. Spare me?)

BTW, I mean this in a totally funny way, but I have a feeling it's not going to come off that way. You ALL know how much I admire/adore you all.

@Meg Marco: In other words, Ben is just a figurehead and doesn't really read those sites.

When I come across a relevant story that might be tipworthy, I have long wondered how to decide whether or not it's a source I should just assume is in the editors' newsfeeds.

I assume the general lack of guidance on what tips to send in is by intent, so as not to pre-filter potentially post-worthy stories.

I kid, I kid.