I kind of get the feeling that mailing it would get it to some underling who's tired of getting random stuff from people angry at the company and toss it out. What would be best is to dig up the home address of an executive and mail it there, although it'd raise the risk of leaking private info to a person who would indefinitely end up being harassed more than he deserves.
]]>AIG Global Real Estate (Headquarters)
277 Park Avenue, 44th Floor
New York, NY 10172
Tel: +1 646.857.8300
Fax: +1 646.857.8406
(AIG Contacts page: [tinyurl.com])
]]>My suggestion is a little more crude. Maybe inbetween your buttcheeks.
]]>How about the off-brand, tre-poo-chet?
]]>@Vanilla5: I would have said, "Through their front window!", but that would be illegal.
]]>:Sigh:
Really sad that was the first thing to come to me.
]]>my girl adds, make sure the base is air tight with the display glass and put several fish heads in the bottom, if they break the glass "ew" if they destroy it to take it out "ew"
]]>Hmmm...you could just throw the trophy at one of those executives, right? Or else...it's a shame you've only got one of these trophies. Maybe you could launch a Golden Poo Carpet Bomb and send each head honcho of AIG a golden poo trophy? It's not the same as launching an EECB, which would be very Consumerist of you to do, but hey--golden poo is one of those things that is best received in person. And preferably with a film crew present to capture all the gory details for posterity, as others have pointed out already. :D
]]>Did comcast actually improve? Or did someone just set the bar lower?
I vote the latter.
]]>[www.freshturd.com] (warning, gross pics on other pages of site)
(There used to be several sites that sent *real* turds, but since this is apparently illegal, they are no longer in operation.)
]]>It should be in its "original" color.
SUGGESTION 2
Put it on top of an ice cream cone and the "recipient" might want to lick it. Then tell them what it is.
However you do it the news media should be told where and when so they can show it on the news, if they will. It would be great if the "recipient" didn't know what kind of an award they are getting.
]]>At least, there's one rationalization of it...
]]>@H3ion:
too god for em
wait... who's stripping? Rosie O'Donnell? Joan Rivers?
]]>overly complex
high probability for fail
ME LIKEY
]]>...
]]>That's right - Consumerist is joining the Stupid Shipping Gang!
]]>@Jessica Haas: Perhaps, but we are simply wishing them good luck next year. It worked for Comcast, last year they were voted WCIA, this year they improved, and were only the second WCIA!
]]>in a box labeled, from The Office of the Tax Payer Organization
]]>A note like that is one of the things every list of package-bomb indicators includes. You are virtually guaranteeing that the cops get called.
Ooohhhhhh.....
]]>Erect a trebuchet a couple blocks away. Calibrate it with rocks of the same weight and size, aiming for the fantasy suite at the top of the building. Bonus points if you actually hit a board member or officer with it.
]]>1) Large ornate looking (but preferably cheap) display case. We're talking a large trophy case here.
2) Sign filling the bottom section with the Consumerist Logo and the headling "2009 worst company in America!
3) Cover for display case.
4) A dollie.
5) A box truck (preferably with lift) Unmarked is better so you can affix the logo of a fictitious delivery company.
6) Jump suits (like you usually see dock workers in)
7) A shill.
The process:
1) Box truck pulls up near the front of the offices, starts unloading the covered display case.
2) Shill begins making a scene/distracting security and the receptionists.
3) Delivery guys walk in casually and unnoticed (just keep your distance... but don't look like you're trying to keep your distance. Deliver casually.
4) Delivery guys place display case in main lobby, remove cover, leave.
5) You better get the damn thing on tape.
]]>"Eh, it's worth about a s**t!"
]]>You know, the ol' we-accept-this-in-hopes-of-not-making-the-list-next-year...
]]>@Mknzybsofh: The photographer shoudl have taken the picture naked. Hey, maybe instead of delivering the Golden Poo®, you deliver a picture of the Golden Poo® where the reflection of the naked photographer is clearly visible.
]]>Looks like a new flavor of soft serve ice cream. Not ominous enough. I can send you some good examples from my back yard if you want to improve the looks of this award. As far as awarding it, have an actual awards ceremony and invite the press. Hold it at some fast food joint and wear a tux.
]]>I suppose this is like taking the Ring of Power to Mount Doom..
]]>As for how to actually deliver it might I suggest a 'stealth' delivery?
]]>On a side note ....
I'm going to the Cayman Islands in a few weeks and I thought it might be interesting to send a post-card from the town of HELL with the names of every executive and CEO at AIG on it. *SNAP!*
]]>See how long it is before it gets removed.
]]>I have that Canon!
]]>@Vanilla5: Ha ha ha ha
]]>"Generally speaking, mass drivers are only practical for small objects at a few kilometers per second; for example 1 kg at 2.5km/s. Heavier objects go proportionally more slowly; and lighter objects may be projected at 20km/s or more."
]]>The Poo Catapult.
]]>The US Government now owns a big piece of AIG, so as a taxpayer you own some of it. Pop up a video on youtube of you accepting the award on behalf of all the other owners of AIG.
]]>What would the look on the x-ray tech's face be when they see a pile of poo show up as metal on the screen??
]]>Put in a box and mark it "Executive Bonus Payout" and see what happens.
]]>Could very well never be opened due to the fear of being a bomb.
]]>Throw it through their window, run like hell. If anyone questions you, act innocent.
]]>Must be addressed something along the lines "To be opened by addressee only"
]]>Do whatever, just make sure it makes it into one of their filthy hands!!!
]]>Mail it to them....but make sure you get delivery confirmation, so we know they got it!
]]>