var json_comments = new Array("
\"user-pic\"
jrizos
February 20, 2009 8:26 PM
Moderate | Flag for review

Wait'll she hears about the \"memorial\" book of his images and wall comments they'll make available for just $19.95 (plus shipping).

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
ArcanaJ
February 20, 2009 10:02 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@UniComp: It's scary because you can totally see them pulling a stunt like that.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
private1111
February 20, 2009 8:27 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Wow I would get a lawyer on that one asap. thats just plain wrong.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
LadySiren is murdering her kids with HFCS and processed cheese
February 20, 2009 9:27 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@private1111:

I smell class action lawsuit. Good lord, is everyone at their PR firm out on vacation this week, or what?!

Someone please pass Facebook the clue biscuits, with jam.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
feckingmorons
February 20, 2009 10:32 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@LadySiren: Who is the class? What are the damages?


Please, stop yelling class action everytime somebody does something you don't like.


There may be an individual action, however I doubt it will get that far. A letter from the lawyer representing the executrix to the counsel for the site should have satisfy any concerns the site has about removing the content of the deceased.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
LadySiren is murdering her kids with HFCS and processed cheese
February 20, 2009 10:37 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@feckingmorons:

Uh, dude? Lrn2sarcasm more, kthx.

I sincerely doubt that this merits a class action suit; my point was I can see someone filing one over this. I guess the subtlety was...er, too subtle for you.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
henwy
February 21, 2009 6:31 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@LadySiren:

That was sarcasm? Maybe you should take remedial lessons. It didn't even come close.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
ahoy-captain
February 20, 2009 8:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

It's a difficult situation. What if the deceased member wanted the page to be left up? I don't think facebook's solution is all that bad an idea.

However, a request from a family member should probably take precedence. But it's not 100 percent obvious.

Dying on social networks is an issue society is going to have to learn its way though.

Reply
12 replies
\"user-pic\"
trujunglist
February 23, 2009 11:59 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain:

I think that there is a incredible amount of merit in having these accounts remain online. For me, I have a ton of friends that I would never really get a chance to speak to without Myspace (I don't do Facebook as of yet). I think it would be helpful if they knew I was dead before they sent me a shout telling me to check some crappy song out.
But, I think that, no matter what, if a family member asks to take the page down, then it should come down. No, there is no monopoly on grief, but let's be honest; who does it hit the hardest most of the time? Who is going to be tormented by your ghostly face more; the guy you had beer with, or the sister he spent his entire life growing up with?
I suppose Facebook would have to put something on their initial TOS that states whether you want it to remain in the case of your death, or if you give consent to so-and-so to take it down (after all, maybe my family hates me and all I have are friends).

Reply
\"user-pic\"
CmdX
February 21, 2009 11:22 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain: Just because you died doesn't mean you no longer exist in people's memories online. Facebook seems to have a very reasonable policy about removing personal information but leaving the page up for friends to post their memories about the person. They aren't exactly broadcasting your profile to the world either, but keeping it among people that the deceased called friends (debate if all your facebook 'friends' are your actual 'friends' elsewhere)

Your family doesn't have a monopoly on grieving for the loss of someone nor do they have a monopoly on the way you will be seen to the world, especially if you have ever posted something online for friends to see. There were more people in the life of the deceased than just family and those people have just as much a right to grieve together online as the immediate family has the right to grieve at a funeral.

Now, if it was the significant other of the deceased, then control of the account itself should be passed to that person who can do with it what they please. If you have power of attorney over that person, you should have the right to control their facebook account. But if you cannot prove that you have that power, sorry, but it should stay up.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
CmdX
February 21, 2009 11:35 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@CmdX: Let me clarify one thing. If the deceased was under the age of 18 at the time of death, then the parent has every right to control that facebook account as he or she sees fit in the first place. And I would imagine the spouse/life-partner/significant-other should have control over it too, but since the person who submitted this request does not fit within those 2 categories (or had any power of attorney over the person before he/she died) then they really don't have any control over the matter.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Sam Pak
February 21, 2009 12:14 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain:

In situations such as these, requests by families usually take preference, no matter what the status of the deceased. Besides, how could anyone possibly know what the deceased person had wanted?

Reply
\"user-pic\"
ravensfire
February 20, 2009 11:18 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain: I always thought it was really touching when after people at my College would die, their friends from school would leave messages of rememberance on their facebook walls. Often, the families of the deceased would thank they people leaving messages.


Maybe as more and more people get into social networking, they need to consider telling their loved ones what they want to happen to their accounts. It sounds like Stephanie's brother was really in to social networking, so maybe he would have wanted his \"memorial?\" The world will never know.


Still Facebook should not refuse to take it down with proof of death.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
xip
February 20, 2009 9:32 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain:

I agree that it's a difficult situation. People look at it in different ways. The author obviously sees leaving the page up as a terrible thing, but not everyone would agree. A guy I know passed away a few years back. Someone immediately got on and deleted his Facebook page. I know at least one of his friends was kind of upset and offended that they would just delete it like that. And another friend remade a memorial page to him. While that's just a single personal example, I have seen quite a few other memorial pages on Myspace as well. While they should probably honor his next-of-kin's wishes over anyone's, I can see the dilemma. Some people make take just as big of offense to deleting the page as she takes to leaving it up.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
goodpete
February 20, 2009 9:20 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain: I agree with you. I had a friend pass away suddenly in college and his Facebook page has remained up ever since. His friends post to his wall on occasion, and I, personally, see it as a nice way to remember him.

However, I think that if his family wanted to remove his profile, they should be able to do so. I can understand that Facebook believes that \"memorializing\" a person's page is an appropriate default action. I have no problem with that. But I think that a deceased person's family's wishes should be paramount and therefore, Facebook should have a method for removing a page at the next-of-kin's request.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
yevarechecha
February 20, 2009 10:19 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@plamoni: Ditto. A student at my school passed away from cancer 2 years ago and his Facebook page is still up. His sister uses it to write little notes to him on the wall. It's heartbreaking.

But if the family wants it taken down, Facebook needs to do the right thing and take it down.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
richcreamerybutter
February 20, 2009 8:47 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ahoy-captain: Now I have to attach a \"remove from Facebook\" rider on my DNR order? Or should this request be included as a part of the loved one's health care proxy?

How is this issue not 100% obvious?

Reply
\"user-pic\"
strathmeyer
February 20, 2009 11:21 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@richcreamerybutter: \"How is this issue not 100% obvious?\"

Should google search results for the names of the deceased be removed? What about and public archive of Facebook's pages?

How do you know when a person dies that they would want their Facebook account deleted? I wouldn't. Why do you assume everyone is the same as you? You seemed to have missed the 'social' part of 'social networking'.

It's not 100% obvious when you actually think about it.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
docrice
February 20, 2009 9:15 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@richcreamerybutter: My new DNR will read as follows:


In the event of my death, DNR me or my facebook page. Keep my myspace though, cause I never liked facebook anyway.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
billy
February 20, 2009 9:08 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@richcreamerybutter: It's not 100% obvious b/c there isn't any law about it. It's not 100% obvious b/c some people may want to have their page memorialized despite their descendants' wishes. Top that with the fact that Facebook has a terms of service agreement. If the member doesn't agree with it, they don't have to sign up.

It sure does put people in an awkward situation.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
WBrink
February 20, 2009 8:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Hey, sentimentality works on the vast majority of the mouth breathing idiots out there. I'm sure that email would've convinced most people. It's a MEMORIAL people!

I'm glad Ms. Bemister is smart enough to see through that. Sorry Facebook, you can't win this one.

Reply
3 replies
\"user-pic\"
Nitro378
February 21, 2009 5:30 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@WBrink:
I am blatantly sickened by your Mouth-breathing discrimination.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
johnfrombrooklyn
February 20, 2009 10:40 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@WBrink: Do you breathe out of your ass?

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
ShubhraFlint
February 20, 2009 8:29 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Makes me wonder if I should stay with Face book. This is horrible.

Reply
3 replies
\"user-pic\"
Rubleaux
February 21, 2009 7:16 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ShubhraFlint: I am deleting my Facebook account while I am alive. I really want to spare my family the agony while I can.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Avery
February 21, 2009 1:42 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

I'm going to some dangerous places next summer. Maybe it would be prurient to delete my Facebook account first.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
JustThatGuy3
February 20, 2009 8:30 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

If she's the executor of his estate, then she should certainly be able to get the page taken down. If she's not, then she shouldn't be, since it's the job of the executor to carry out the deceased's wishes.

Reply
4 replies
\"user-pic\"
D-Bo
February 20, 2009 9:15 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@JustThatGuy3: The whole thing really hinges on this. If she's not the executor she needs to contact them, not FB.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
floraposte
February 20, 2009 9:19 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@D-Bo: Except there's no indication in their response that they'd listen to an executor.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
ecwis
February 21, 2009 5:16 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@floraposte: They would be required to by law. Facebook shouldn't just listen to one daughter. The whole point of an executor is so that only one person is authorised to make decisions so people don't have to put up with arguments among family members.

If Facebook did shut down the page, the executor might complain saying that they still wanted it up as a memorial. This is why you just listen to the executor. So just have the executor email Facebook with their Letter of Authority.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Mistrez_Mish
February 20, 2009 8:57 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@JustThatGuy3: She sent them a copy of his death certificate and she can't even get them to take it down. :( At this point, it doesn't look like they would care if she is the executive of his estate.


Good job Facebook - nice slap in the face to this guy's family.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
JohnDeere
February 20, 2009 8:46 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@JustThatGuy3: ya. shes proabably \"THAT\" family member.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
aguacarbonica
February 20, 2009 8:34 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I'm so freaking disgusting with Facebook. I've been trying to take my closest (but physically farthest away) friends elsewhere in preparation for eventually getting rid of my account.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
feckingmorons
February 20, 2009 10:36 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@aguacarbonica: And how much do you pay for facebook? Who forced you to post your information there?


Reply
\"user-pic\"
aguacarbonica
February 20, 2009 10:46 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@feckingmorons:

What are you even talking about? I didn't complain about anything Facebook has done to me. When I registered for the site four years ago, I liked it. Now I do not, but I do not want to sacrifice the ease of communication with my friends, so I am encouraging them to register for other sites.

What does this have to do with \"my information\" and why do you even care?

Also I meant \"disgusted\" above, not disgusting, obviously. Thought I'd correct my typo.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
ThinkerTDM
February 20, 2009 8:34 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I feel for the poster, I really do. However, unless they are legally the person responsible for his affairs, there is nothing you can do, and bullying Facebook won't do anything.


Also, did they remove the sensitive items? That should be your focus, not dictating to others how you want to them to remember such a remarkable person.


Lastly, let people remember him the way they want. Perhaps some people would like to see how he touched others, or would feel better in their pain to see they are not alone in mourning him. If his friend list is full of people he has never met, then this is probably the only way they can remember him.
To summarize: it is not yours to control.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
Ber'Zophus
February 20, 2009 8:56 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ThinkerTDM: So...whose responsibility is it then? The general public's? How much of the public actually is mourning him? Considering this is facebook, I wouldn't be surprised to see only a few tasteless \"jokes\" on the wall, which is likely the last thing the family really needs right now.

As you state, it's really the executor of the estate that has the right anyway....but even if she weren't, I don't think some decency to the people closest affected is out of the question.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
ThinkerTDM
February 20, 2009 9:18 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Ber'Zophus: You do have a point, but where does this end? Should we scrub everything of the \"memory\" of deceased ones? Should we scrub billing records so that when one of her daughters buys something, his name doesn't show up?


For crying out loud, she is disrespecting his memory by choosing such a silly place for a fight. Now her daughters can not only remember him by his facebook page, but also the length news reports, and internet postings, and perhaps lawsuit. That's a nice thought.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Ber'Zophus
February 20, 2009 9:50 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ThinkerTDM: I certainly can agree that this isn't the place to be making an argument. It's not exactly doing the deceased any service. If anything it's just drawing more attention to him....the wrong kind of attention.

Unfortunately if I was in her position I don't know what I'd do. No one can really say how she wants (or doesn't want) his memory honoured or why and what makes it \"right\" or \"wrong\", but in the end she ultimately doesn't want a facebook page open. She attempted to get it closed through the company, and that didn't work. It's drastic, but letting the internet know about it may actually get it resolved...though I admit the price may not be worth it. I do question....if you really don't want non-family and friends to abuse the listing, and you want to move on without the memories lingering, is letting the internet know really going to help that?

Reply
\"user-pic\"
ThinkerTDM
February 20, 2009 10:58 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Ber'Zophus: She needs to stop trying to control how people remember him. This is essentially the same as standing by his grave, and screaming at people who make fun of his name.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Humbert Humbert
February 21, 2009 5:43 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ThinkerTDM: A grave has a limited number of viewers and not everyone will know its location. Facebook is on the internet. The internet is potentially open to everyone. How would you feel if the KKK showed up at black friend's funeral? On the internet, it's very easy for them to do that. Considering that this man was a \"Nazi hunter,\" I wouldn't be surprised if Neo-Nazis hit his facebook page. There's a big difference between a grave and the internet. There's also the issue of a large mostly faceless website deciding that it gets to choose what happens to people when they die and whether people should be permanently immortalized on the internet.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
sophistiKate
February 21, 2009 1:15 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Humbert Humbert: You make a good point, except that the quote from Facebook clearly states that only friends can see his profile, so in this case, it's not only not easy but impossible for hateful strangers to \"show up at (the) funeral\".

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Tijil
February 20, 2009 8:36 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

My first thought is that a letter from the executor of the estate should end all arguments such as this.

If the executor, the person now legally in control of the deceased persons affairs, says \"take it down\" it should come down, end of discussion.

Perhaps a short letter from a lawyer would get Facebook's attention and get them to remove the page.

Reply
1 replies
\"user-pic\"
vmorgs
February 21, 2009 12:39 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Tijil: Better than that, the Executor of the Estate can write a letter to Facebook requesting the account password. As Executor, they have a legal right to that information. Once Facebook supplies them with the password, they can either shut down the account completely or allow it to be \"memorialized\" in a more appropriate way.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
enm4r
February 20, 2009 8:40 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

And if another family member wanted the page to stay up? What would facebook do then?


Unfortunately death brings about many problems, and certainly this is one of societies newer ones. The executor's checklist should now include \"determine what to do with social networking sites.\"


As most people have probably seen first hand, families do not always agree after the death of a loved one, and Facebook should not be expected to be forced to choose which family member is the right family member to take direction from.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
Trai_Dep
February 21, 2009 12:20 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@enm4r: That's why they have an executor - in situations that fall thru the cracks like this, you choose someone you think would make the right call.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Mirshaan
February 20, 2009 9:13 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@enm4r:


Then Facebook should take on the new policy of:


\"We only display living people.\" Then the whole debate is done.


I find memorial facebook pages extremely creepy anyway.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
harlock_JDS
February 20, 2009 8:40 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I'd have to agree with some of the others. It should be up to the estate to demand the removal of his information from the network and i'm not sure she repersents the estate in this case. I would assume his estate can get the login information for his page and do what they will if not then that's an issue.

Of course people involved online need to think about what happens to their online life when they die. Things like what you want done with online networking profiles should be a part of one's will. At the very least make sure a loved one has your username and password.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Pibbs
February 20, 2009 8:43 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

All these problems with Facebook lately make me glad that I closed or removed all of my social networking stuff (facebook and myspace) almost 2 years ago.

Everyone should do the same. I remember how we networked before teh internets. We picked up the phone, and we called someone.

Reply
4 replies
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 20, 2009 9:37 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@MrPibbistheGreatestSodaEver: Yeahhhhh...I don't own a landline. Also, most of the people I have on Facebook I have out of obligation, not because I actually want to engage in social intercourse.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
erin_w (formerly femme_dork)
February 21, 2009 2:55 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@SpiderJerusalem: Point of order: picking up a phone does not necessarily imply landline. You can still \"pick up\" your cell phone, so the point can still stand.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 21, 2009 10:02 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@femme_dork: point of disorder: landlines are less expensive for local-type calls than my precious, precious minutes (I'm stuck with a crappy Sprint plan for a while yet).

Also, I love your name. Let's run away to Canada and get married.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Skybolt
February 20, 2009 9:10 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@MrPibbistheGreatestSodaEver: I don't know, that sounds very risky and modern. You had better stick with handwritten letters and visiting with your neighbors.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
picardia
February 20, 2009 8:43 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I agree with the consensus -- Facebook's policy isn't bad as a fallback, but if she's the executor of the estate, then they should honor it.


I also think Facebook should think seriously about the long-term implications of ALWAYS keeping EVERY dead user's information up forever.

Reply
1 replies
\"user-pic\"
Karita
February 21, 2009 3:27 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@picardia: I don't have any argument, here, and I'm probably posting this too late. But what ARE the long-term implications? Aside from using extra storage space, I can't see any. And really, I doubt Facebook will be around for generations, where storage would become a legitimate issue.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Kos
February 20, 2009 8:45 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Executor decides. If another family member wants it to stay up, create a Facebook Group \"In remembrance of...\" and move on.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
Vanilla5
February 20, 2009 10:45 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@CFinWV: Agreed. We did that for a friend who died suddenly after high school. Somehow his account came down and we did a memorial page.

Why can't they do the same for this guy?

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Darwin Smith
February 20, 2009 8:46 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I really like the fact that they don't just delete it. The fact that a persons profile remains as a memorial is great though I think a family member should be able to have some control over what is shown.

I think it is selfish to choose that you want the page taken down for your own reasons. Think about how people might feel that would like to send the deceased a message of some sort even if it is just a Happy birthday on Facebook.

Reply
3 replies
\"user-pic\"
Tsubasa
February 21, 2009 4:52 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Darwin Smith: There's a certain irony in wishing a dead person a happy birthday, don't you think? Also, the person is dead. You're not communicating with them by posting on their page, you're just posting stuff for others to read. That's the sort of thing you can do on your own Facebook page.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
halloweenjack
February 20, 2009 10:29 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Darwin Smith: Sorry, but I think that his own sister should have priority over J. Random Facebook User.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
floraposte
February 20, 2009 9:21 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Darwin Smith: It's not going to be any less--or more--effective on Facebook than anywhere else, though.

Reply
","","","
\"user-pic\"
Mr. Guy
February 20, 2009 8:48 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

man, facebook is batting .1000 this week. my prediction: this guy's page comes down in less than 24 hours now that this story has appeared on consumerist.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
harlock_JDS
February 20, 2009 8:53 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Mr. Guy:

i think you mean 1.000 and i'm not sure if the page should come down just because one family member wants it to come down.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Mr. Guy
February 20, 2009 9:18 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@harlock_JDS: yes, i did mean 1.000, and i guess we'll just have to wait and see what becomes of his page.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Wit
February 20, 2009 8:51 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I'm also going with the consensus, here. If she's the executrix of his estate and can prove that to Facebook, then Facebook should take down the information, \"policy\" be damned.

If she's just \"a relative\" making this demand then it's not so clear. I can think of plenty of my relatives that I don't want to have any say over my stuff when I'm gone, even the electronic bits.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
digitalgimpus
February 20, 2009 8:52 PM
Moderate |Flag for review


It's not just ethics, but the law.

Ok, I'm calling the bluff. Can someone specifically cite this law in either the state of CA, Del (where incorporated) or Federal law?

AFAIK there's nothing dictating where a deceased persons name can or can't be used after death. For example anyone can list a persons name as diseased in a periodical. You don't need permission.

If it's not true of course it could be libel. There's no \"right\" to control use of a name post death.

IMHO this is no different than any other publication publishing an obituary or listing the name as diseased without consent of executor.

Reply
6 replies
\"user-pic\"
tingeyga
February 20, 2009 10:40 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@digitalgimpus:
If I remember the 1 hour primer on probate and trust law that I received back in the summer correctly, having an obituary in the local paper in an important process in having one's estate move through probate. The obituary serves as a public notice of the death and starts a clock on a time frame in which those who the deceased owed money to can settle the debts owed to them before the inheritance is distributed according to the will.

So there really is a big difference between Facebook denying a relative's takedown request and an obituary.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
feckingmorons
February 20, 2009 10:38 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@digitalgimpus: There is no such law.


N.B. This is not legal advice, if you need legal advice seek competent counsel in your jurisdiction.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
idip
February 20, 2009 9:11 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@digitalgimpus: What do copyright laws say about this?

As I understand it, if I take a picture, I own the copyright to that picture if it is of myself.

If you die, isn't it fair to assume the copyright rights go to the family? Anything on that facebook listing belongs to this lady's brother.

Is it so wrong of her to ask Facebook to 'return' it or to remove it. I mean... they are trying to say they don't own it, but by leaving his page up they are effectively saying that they now own it since he is no longer... alive. :-(

Reply
\"user-pic\"
digitalgimpus
February 21, 2009 8:15 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@idip: Exactly my point. If the subject of a picture dies, the copyright of the picture isn't transferred to the executor of the subject. The picture is copyright the creator irregardless.

Now that the page was removed... what about photos others created and posted containing this diseased? Is this person going to sue each and every one of them?

There's a lot of ethical questions here as you go deeper and deeper.

That said, IMHO removing traces of a dead persons existence is abhorrent to put it mildly.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
SunnyLea
February 21, 2009 9:52 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@digitalgimpus: I say this as gently as possible and with no intention to mock:

The word you are looking for is deceased. While being the diseased sometimes leads to being the deceased, they aren't one in the same. :)

Reply
\"user-pic\"
bravohotel01
February 20, 2009 10:40 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@idip: If you die, isn't it fair to assume the copyright rights go to the family?

Fair?
No. Yes. Maybe. It depends. What if the nearest living relative is 'Crazy' Uncle Ernie, whom you haven't interacted in 20 years?

Legal?
Um, are you basing this on firsthand/legal knowledge or the typical internet attitude of \"citing sources is 4 n00bs\"?

Reply
\"user-pic\"
harlock_JDS
February 20, 2009 8:56 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@digitalgimpus: and i don't even see anything saying she is the executor. Sounds like just a family member.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
DaoKaioshin
February 20, 2009 8:53 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

for all who haven't been following facebook, 'memorial' pages came from several prominent deaths on facebook. when kids died, facebook would immediately take down them and all their media. family and friends complained about not having any sort of access to all the photos and public conversations they had with their loved one. i think this was instituted in response

i think the difficulty comes from who facebook gives control of the account to, who gains the right to exercise removing or memorializing the page.

Reply
1 replies
\"user-pic\"
IphtashuFitz
February 20, 2009 9:19 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@DaoKaioshin: Sounds to me like Facebook needs to learn how to be flexible and not take an \"all or nothing\" approach. They went from \"take down a profile when the person dies\" to \"never take down a profile when the person dies\". Neither one of those is appropriate 100% of the time, and they should have recognized that fact when they changed their \"all\" policy to a \"none\" one. Rather than a knee-jerk reaction that they appear to have taken they should have seriously thought about it and come up with one along the lines of \"we'll memorialize a profile unless contacted by the next of kin and/or executor with a request to have it removed\".

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 20, 2009 8:54 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I have a friend who has passed and his page remains up. I find it comforting to return to and view images and read the messages left every now and then.

This person should take comfort in the fact that a part of her brother's life lives on.

That said, it is presumptuous of her to believe she has the right to take it down. Her brother legally entered into a contract with facebook which states this is their policy on pages after a death.

Whether she likes it or not, it was an agreement her brother accepted. She is not an applicable party to this legally.

Reply
4 replies
\"user-pic\"
dreamsneverend
February 21, 2009 2:03 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@GwendolynHalomiosis: I'm siding with you on this one. My best friend died of cancer last year and his myspace page remains up, I occasionally look at it since it's like a time capsule to me and I smile when I see the pics of him and myself goofing around. I'm glad it's still there and his family didn't raise a stink about things being left behind.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
nick.sideras
February 21, 2009 12:44 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@GwendolynHalomiosis: Actually, I can't find anything in their TOS or other related documents that refers to any policy that falls into place in the event of death. This is probably something else that should be added in there, both for clarity's sake and Facebook's own.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
lintacious
February 20, 2009 9:55 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@GwendolynHalomiosis: It is pretty obvious that a lot of the reason why she wants the page taken down is because she cannot access it! She was not confirmed to be his \"friend\" on facebook, so she does not have any emotional connections to his facebook page.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
bravohotel01
February 20, 2009 10:41 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@lintacious: because she cannot access it!

Too bad he didn't allow FoF before he kicked the bucket...

Reply
","","","
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 20, 2009 8:57 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Maybe this should be part of the registration process? You know:

In case of your untimely demise (check one):
\"Remove all mention of me from the site immediately\"
\"Notify everyone in my network, so they can save any photos or comments they want and then delete my profile.\"
\"IMMORTALIZE ME, BEETCHES!\"

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
Mirshaan
February 20, 2009 9:15 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@SpiderJerusalem:


As tongue in cheek as this is.... it's not a bad idea.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 20, 2009 9:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Mirshaan: Thank you. I didn't realize I was being tongue-in-cheek.

It's not like this would be hard for Facebook to implement. They have, in the past, made scripts to force the entire population to conform to some new registration requirement.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
douglasdavisjr
February 20, 2009 9:01 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I personally would want my facebook page to stay up after I die. It sucks if he didn't specify what to do in this sort of situation, and if he didn't then to him leaving it up or taking it down probably just wasn't that important.

Reply
","","","","","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
ailema
February 20, 2009 9:16 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I don't want my 'closest relative' to be able to demand my social networking accounts be closed after my death. If they took down the contact information then I don't see a problem.

Reply
","","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
Barry Schnitt
February 20, 2009 9:21 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Hi there, all the user has to do is identify themselves as the next of kin and we are happy to close the account. The user in this instance only said she was a relative and used a different name (not the same last name as the user), otherwise we would have granted the request. We should have asked the user for more info and, for that mistake, we apologize. However, it is a simply misunderstanding and your story and their note does not reflect our actual policy.

When we find out a user is deceased, we automatically memorialize an account. Users can also ask to have an account memorialized here: [www.facebook.com] This means that it is frozen (no more friends can be added) and the privacy options are made more strict (friends only). The vast majority of people who contact us about deceased friends want these records maintained so that they and others can remember and celebrate the person. Here is an example: [www.nytimes.com] However, as I mentioned, we're happy to close the account, too, if the person identifies themselves as someone who should have that authority.
Sorry for the confusion.

Barry Schnitt
Facebook Communications

Reply
10 replies
\"user-pic\"
Fletchb
February 24, 2009 2:12 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Barry Schnitt:

What FB needs to do for the future is make their policy clear so there are no misunderstandings. And please make sure you have enough reps to handle these requests in a timely manner. I can see both sides on this and glad it is resolved now.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
nick.sideras
February 21, 2009 12:48 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Barry Schnitt: Barry, that link doesn't work for me. I'm also wondering (as I commented earlier) if Facebook has an official explanation of anything that is done in the event of death. I couldn't find anything in the TOS or elsewhere in the Help area of the website.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Rohan Singh
February 21, 2009 7:06 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@nick.sideras: The link has an extra period at the end. Just copy and paste it and remove the period.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
tvh2k
February 20, 2009 10:31 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Barry Schnitt:
Thanks for explaining facebook policy and clarifying the situation, Barry.

Honestly Ben, I love the consumerist but this post was totally sensationalized and not properly fact-checked. If you want to maintain the respect of companies and the press (RE: all the press you got over the facebook TOS shenanigans), you'll need to do your homework a bit more. At least email some at facebook to get their side of the story before posting. You knew they'd be quick to respond after all that bad PR earlier this week.

Just my 2c...

Reply
\"user-pic\"
supercereal
February 20, 2009 11:53 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@tvh2k: As an avid Consumerist reader, I learned a long time ago that journalistic integrity doesn't apply to this site...and most blogs in general. One sided, quick-to-accuse, anti-business stories yield page views around here.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
idip
February 23, 2009 2:10 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@supercereal: Funny though.

\"REAL\" press, like CNN and MSNBC, amongst others ALWAYS send for the 'suspect's' comment. Usually it turns out like so:

\"Calls to company x's office went unanswered, not immediately returned, responded that they don't comment on individual accounts\".

It's possible Facebook would have never responded.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
mgy
February 20, 2009 9:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Barry Schnitt: You're completely right Barry. I'm sure it was a random stranger emailing you his death certificate with a polite request to remove the page.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 12:35 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@mgy: \"The user in this instance only said she was a relative and used a different name (not the same last name as the user)\"

Could have been. How'd you like it if a stranger claimed they were family and got your page pulled off the site? IMO, great policy Facebook. Just a shame about the miscommunication between user and support.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 20, 2009 9:32 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@mgy: that is a good point he doesn't address. On the other hand, if dude was, for instance, gay, and she was, for instance, a fundamentalist, she might want his site to come down for her own reasons. We don't know, and neither does Facebook without the express wishes of his executor.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
kenblakely
February 20, 2009 9:25 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Barry Schnitt:

\"However, as I mentioned, we're happy to close the account, too, if the person identifies themselves as someone who should have that authority.\"

See? There ya go. Once again we find that Consumerist conveniently fails to get the whole story before going off half-cocked.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Jeff Clark
February 20, 2009 9:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@kenblakely:

This seems to be the story behind most blogs in general.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
kenblakely
February 20, 2009 9:23 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

\"It's not just ethics, but the law.\"

There goes Ben Popken again - making assertions with no basis amd saying stuff he knows nothing about. Help us out here, Ben: What law are you referring to?

Reply
","","","","
\"user-pic\"
BuddyHinton
February 20, 2009 9:28 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

The ensuing \"Consumerist Conflagration\" will resolve this issue shortly I'm sure...

Reply
","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
appetite
February 20, 2009 9:43 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

It seems that the people who run Facebook lack real world social awareness, and are probably not the best candidates to run the virtual social web.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
ElizabethD
February 20, 2009 9:46 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@appetite:

Invoking the geek doctrine ftw.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Spider Jerusalem
February 20, 2009 9:45 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@appetite: ...because...there's a vetting process to start up a website that balloons?

Reply
","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
DeeJayQueue
February 20, 2009 9:56 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

how about something like this:

\"We're so sorry to learn of the death of your friend/relative, please let us know how we can help you.

_ remove their entire profile, including pictures, wall, posted items, personal information, etc.

_ \"memorialize\" their profile, leaving some pictures (that you can decide upon), the wall, and some other key features in tact.

Thank you and once again our condolences on your loss. Sincerely, the Facebook team.\"

I mean, how hard is that to send to someone, especially after they've already sent proof of death.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Kesov
February 20, 2009 10:10 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

My brother died last year (jan 30th). I asked them to take the page down, and they did. I guess they must have changed their rules again?

Reply
","","","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 20, 2009 10:38 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I find this article somewhat strange. My older brother passed away a few years ago and I asked Facebook to keep his profile up as a place for people to post memories. This was there response:

\"Our policy in situations such as these is to memorialize your brother's profile, which means that we remove all but the basic information and his picture. After thirty days, his profile will be removed from the site. This is primarily to protect the account from would-be intruders.\"

So I guess they have had a change of mind ...

Reply
","","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
ceez
February 20, 2009 10:52 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

come on facebook...use some common sense...you feel that you have enough power to \"memorialized this person's account\" like if it's an internet graveyard...it's a 2nd life where people share their life and when they pass they become tombstones for people to remember them? you have no right to do this to family members or to even keep the data of dead people available on the web.


it's pitiful and disgusting.

Reply
1 replies
\"user-pic\"
supercereal
February 20, 2009 11:56 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@ceez: No offense to anyone, but just because a person dies, doesn't mean that every trace of them disappears from the internet. Anyone with half an idea of \"how the internet works\" knows that the vast majority of data that goes online, will stay online in some form or another.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Cyco
February 20, 2009 10:57 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I had an issue with MySpace over my brother's death this past Aug. After he passed, I contacted MySpace asking for his password so we could access his site. I explained that my family would like to keep it active as a memorial page for him. They responded that they could either do nothing or delete it, but under no circumstances would they help with the password. I wrote back explaining that we could provider just about any type of proof of his death and we feel we have the right to be able to access his profile and once again they said no.


I can understand to a degree that they wouldn't want to give access to a profile to people that they don't know with documentaion that could be forgered, but on the flip side, they are willing to delete the profile with out any proof other than me saying he passed. It just doesn't seem right.

Reply
3 replies
\"user-pic\"
SunnyLea
February 21, 2009 9:59 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Cyco: I'm glad they wouldn't give it to you. I don't mind my family/friends *viewing* the information I've already put out there for them to see, but for them to have *control* over my content?

If I'd wanted that I'd have given them the password to being with.

Bully for MySpace for not coughing up someone's personal information.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Cyco
February 24, 2009 1:48 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@SunnyLea: Yeah, bully them for not providing a password for a deceased relative. Great heart you have. I pray you never have to be put in an situation like mine.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
SunnyLea
February 24, 2009 3:51 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Cyco: If you are praying I never have a deceased, close, loved one 1)you are already too late and 2)since everyone dies it is gonna happen again.

If you are praying that I never have to haggle with MySpace over trying to get a password for an account that is not my own, then your prayers are bound to work, since I think I've made it abundantly clear that I don't believe being dead gives you or anyone else the right to control and view anyone's personal accounts.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
K-Bo
February 21, 2009 3:13 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Cyco: I'd rather them delete it than to give out my password. I'm sure many people have messages and such they may not want seen. My brother is one of my best friends and I love him to no end, but sometimes he pisses me off to no end. I'd hate to think that a private message I sent a friend venting about it would be seen by him after my death. Little things like that could hurt an awful lot of feelings. I think they should add a question about this to the registration process so people can decide for themselves.

Reply
","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
creative differences
February 20, 2009 11:59 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

My father passed away last February, and my mother wanted to delete his Facebook profile. The ONLY WAY she could do so was to log into his account - Facebook would not delete his account on the request of a third person. Sick.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 12:11 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

She went about it the wrong way. She should have sent an email saying that William was impersonating her and that she was the real William Bemister, and Facebook would've taken his profile down immediately. They do it all the time, without warning the user or attempting to verify identity in any way, and many real users have been locked out of their legitimate accounts for this reason.

Not that she should have to do this, but if I ever need a deceased relative's profile removed from Facebook, that's what I'd do. That being said, I'm gathering a list of my logins and passwords to put in my last will and testament, so that my profiles can be removed after my death.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Butte-Monkey
February 21, 2009 12:20 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

If you have ever lost someone you will appreciate that when someone dies you need to have this information removed quickly for several reasons: for security purposes, to stop strangers incessantly phoning and emailing the deceased and the worst of all, the sheer grief of dealing with hundreds of people who believe he is still alive and need to be informed of his death.

Somehow, I don't think that'll be a problem.

Reply
2 replies
\"user-pic\"
K-Bo
February 21, 2009 3:14 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

@Butte-Monkey: Could be a problem for people who share that phone number, not fun to have to explain over and over what happened.

Reply
\"user-pic\"
Butte-Monkey
February 23, 2009 8:26 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

@K-Bo: Well, yeah, but that's not what the complainant wrote.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
corinthos
February 21, 2009 12:21 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Glad to hear Facebook responded. When i die I want all my stuff left up. I might eventually invest in a safe and keep account information and password in it so when I go my next of kin will have that info to keep certain against alive or post of my passing.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Drew Biondo
February 21, 2009 12:30 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Start a Face Book group demanding justice.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
f3rg
February 21, 2009 12:36 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

If I die, I want my FB profile left up. I'd be pissed if my sister or wife wrote them to have it pulled.

Reply
","","","","
\"user-pic\"
Corporate_guy
February 21, 2009 1:08 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

So facebook listed him as deceased? Or just stripped the page and left a wall?

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
BK124
February 21, 2009 1:09 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

This story is rather sad, but I do believe that I have a possible solution to this problem for this person but it does rely on a few factors.

Alot of people use Mozilla Firefox as an internet browser it could be possible that he does too. And I know the person said that he is very far from him, but if there is a chance that they know someone who can get access to his computer or anywhere else where he logged in and this could work. Here goes.

Firefox saves any of the passwords you tell it to, and with a little bit of knowledge you could easily get to these passwords and possibly get someone to delete the account for you granted, like I said before, you have someone who can access a computer he logged onto facebook with.

But in the Tools menu of firefox go to Options. Then the Securty Tab and then in the password box click saved
passwords. This will show all the usernames for whenever a log in was required. Then just click show passwords and it will reveal all the passwords also.

Like I said this has alot of requirements but I'm just giving a possible option. Otherwise I wish you the best of luck in this ordeal.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Danny Boy
February 21, 2009 1:22 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Wow, that's one freakishly possessive website. Good thing I never created an account there. I don't want my content to be owned by an uncaring, info-grabbing company.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 1:35 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Barry Schnitt seemed to clear this whole thing up. Thanks for the clarification. The executor of the estate can simply have the account taken down. Thank you Facebook.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Amber Sabah Khan
February 21, 2009 1:45 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

just so you know, facebook doesn't delete ANYONE. i have tried for years to get my own personal profile totally deleted but as you can tell it hasnt happened. at least on myspace they let you delete your account and not just suspend it.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Greg Smalter
February 21, 2009 2:30 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

I run a small social network for artists, writers, musicians and such (impnow.com), and if someone produced a death certificate for that person, I would take down the profile in an instant. Let the dead guy complain. The rest of the family and his \"friends\" could erect their own memorial, but I'm not about to decide to take it upon myself to be the arbitor of what is appropriate. It's a social netork profile, for God's sake.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
benn09
February 21, 2009 2:50 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

From the Terms of Service:

\"When we are notified that a user has died, we will generally, but are not obligated to, keep the user's account active under a special memorialized status for a period of time determined by us to allow other users to post and view comments.\"

If they are not obligated to keep the page up and have received requests from the family to take down the page, I don't see why they are still keeping it up. What is even more unclear is what they consider to be an appropriate period of time to keep the profile up.

Perhaps they need to include an option upon sign up that asks what the user wants them to do with a profile upon being notified of a death. I'm honestly surprised they haven't done so already given how sensitive this subject is. It would be so simple for them to tell family/friends that they had to take down the profile or leave it up due to the user's request.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
George Lodge
February 21, 2009 2:53 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

In most cases, next-of-kin have the legal right to determine the disposition of the body of the deceased and also the estate, unless otherwise specified. For Facebook to refuse a request from the next-of-kin seems like it should be illegal, regardless of the TOS.

Irrespective of the law, I think the request of the family should be honored unless the will of the deceased explicitly states otherwise.

Having dealt with the death of both of my parents, I can well imagine how I would feel if they had a Facebook page which Facebook refused to delete.

Facebook, I think you are wrong on this one, and if it were my parent, I would be contacting a lawyer right now.

Reply
","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
nacoran
February 21, 2009 4:42 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Why does she think she is the person who gets to decide that his page gets taken down? What if other family members want it left up? It actually bothers me more that the other sites took it down. I'm not sure I want my facebook or myspace page to live beyond me, but I certainly don't want one family member to have that choice unless I chose them to make it.

That said, social sites should give you some options. They could easily add an option to appoint a secondary person who becomes the executor of your account if you die. That person could decide if they want to delete the page, freeze it, or maintain the wall.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Randy Treibel
February 21, 2009 5:12 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

I agree there are so many corrupt relatives who try to take control of a web page. I mean if they knew him that well they could have easily got his email address from his computer and got a password send to it and nuked it. Obviously this person was not that savvy or not that close to him. Anyways kudos to facebook. I've seen so much familiar corruption and tyranny over what they thought was right.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Nitrokart knows CPR and took that guy's wallet
February 21, 2009 5:12 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

What gives Facebook the right to keep up the profiles of a deceased member? I think Facebook is better than MySpace, but with the recent happenings involving the site, I just don't know...

Hopefully this post will get the message through to the thick-headed management at Facebook.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 5:25 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

At first, before I thought about it, I was on the side of the sister. Now I've rethought it. Family members fighting over the disposition of property - whether of sentimental or financial value - is a cliche. In a sense, the Facebook page is like a \"diary\" the author chose to make public. Why is it up to the sister to decide it shouldn't be public any longer? Is she truly concerned about \"people who will need to be informed\" - isn't the memorial page itself likely to do the job of spreading the news to these online friends? The \"contract with Facebook\" her brother had doesn't just give Facebook the \"right\" to display his page; it also protects the brother's choices.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Jessy Irwin
February 21, 2009 5:59 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

This is 100% correct. This happened in response to Facebook trying to remove the 32 profiles of people who were killled at my university (Virginia Tech) on April 16,2007. I remember there being a huge group on Facebook protesting the removal of their information, and after that date in 2007, they changed the memorial/profile deleting policies. In that respect, I am thankful that they changed it because I do still go to the pages of people I knew who died that day; if they were gone, I'd have no way of remembering.

In this case, can understand how a sister might want to remove the page, but I believe that such action will require legal counsel.

Reply
","","","
\"user-pic\"
Rohan Singh
February 21, 2009 7:09 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Now that Facebook has actually responded and provided a reasonable explanation for what happened, is anybody going to update the story?

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
FunkmasterC
February 21, 2009 7:25 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

\"There are strangers in his membership list who can write whatever they wish on his Wall and I, his next of kin and sister, cannot even view his page. It is horrible. How can Facebook be so insensitive to the wishes of a deceased member's family? I have never in my life felt so betrayed, angry and sickened.\"

And by strangers, you mean \"people he accepted as friends\" and by \"I and next of kin\" you mean someone he does not acknowledge as a friend. This person sounds like they have a hidden agenda.

Reply
","","","","
\"user-pic\"
mushpuppy
February 21, 2009 12:09 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Facebook has a knack for doing the wrong thing. Over and over and over.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 2:01 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

An \"executor\" deleting a person's facebook page seems a bit presumptuous to me, unless its in the will. A person is not like an unwanted fetus, with no rights, able to be aborted or erased by a relative that might be otherwise troubled or embarrassed.

Reply
","","","
\"user-pic\"
Anonymous
February 21, 2009 4:47 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

If she is the executor she would need to provide Facebook with some form of verification that as well as documentation that she is a relative of her brother in order to gain access to the page. I don't see the issue here other than she just isn't following the appropriate channels to get things done.

Reply
","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
SGAC
February 22, 2009 3:46 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Sorry for the loss of your brother. When I read about your story, I immediately told my husband to make sure that whatever virtual life I had to please be deleted after I die. I'll know he'll respect my wishes because I know my husband has a \"Plan Omega\" for his webcomic so that the FINAL episode can be uploaded and his webpage can still exist for six more months before the domain name lapses.

Reply
","","
\"user-pic\"
clickable
February 23, 2009 6:53 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Her particular case is somewhat unusual, in that her brother died before he \"friended\" her, and because as a Nazi hunter, his Facebook page could have attracted an unsavory element. Since she was not his \"friend,\" she couldn't even see and monitor his page, and keep an eye out for hate speech that could be reported to the site's administration. (Although I'm not sure what their policy is on hate speech and whether they would delete it.)


She doesn't say whether she is the executor, but she says her brother only knew three women personally besides herself and her two daughters, and that she went to England for his memorial service, so I wouldn't be surprised if she is executor.


I think the executor should have the power to demand that it be taken down. If it is a situation where leaving the page up for a while is serving a good cause, i.e., giving people a place to cybergather and honor a deceased friend, I would hope the executor would allow it to remain for some time after the person died, and only take it down after a year or two.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
OprahBabb
February 23, 2009 11:25 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Okay, okay. Facebook.....Myspace. Get out the ruler, we'll settle this once and for all.

Myspace takes down your stuff without saying anything and Facebook REFUSES to take shit down. /yawn with these networking sites already.

Reply
","","","","","","","
\"user-pic\"
Lalita Amos
March 26, 2009 8:55 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

Not everyone who has lost someone gets freaked out seeing their faces or knowing that their page would still be up.

I think a little perspective is needed here.

If her nieces don't want to see their uncle in their friend list, they could block (colloquially called \"unfriending\") him, removing him from their friend lists. That would be a permanent solution, given the fact that no one would then be able to add them back when they become more accustomed to the grief.

Calm. Down. Please.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
Richard Rabinowitz
April 1, 2009 3:05 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

Hi. I came upon this when I was thinking about Shawn Sincoff, the deceased brother of Rachel Sincoff Mantione, a friend of mine. All three of us have Facebook accounts, and I was wondering what Sincoff and Co. ought to do about Shawn's Facebook account.

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
hmen
August 3, 2009 11:23 AM
Moderate |Flag for review

I don't think we fully understand the concept of social networking.


It is just an online extension of real life.


When someone dies, do we then also write a letter to all their friends asking them to please burn all letters they ever got from them, throw away pictures of them, etc? Erase them from existence all together?


Why should this page be deleted?

Reply
","
\"user-pic\"
SFSam
August 30, 2009 4:41 PM
Moderate |Flag for review

I tried to find Bill Bemister (from Seattle) on Facebook but did not come across anyone that sounded/looked like him. I suppose they finally came to their senses and took down the profile. I certainly hope so!


I am have a different, less serious problem: Facebook will not let me remove it as my opening page. I have tried every possible way I can think of. Does anyone know if this is possible to do? I find that Facebook takes a long time to load (probably because there are so many users), and would like to change to something else. So far no luck.

Reply
");