Comments for

UNIQLO Dispenses HEATTECH Innerware From "Giant Human Vending Machine" ...What's That?

2008-11-14T00:45:05Z

To promote its new line of HEATTECH innerware (that's the new word for thermal underwear), UNIQLO will be giving out free samples of it in a "giant human vending machine" from 10AM-1PM in the middle of Times Square on November 18th. Intrigued by the concept of a giant human vending machine but befuddled about its execution, I engaged in parlay with their PR flak, with amusing and quirky results. So now, we bring you the first installment in our new series: Conversations With PR Flaks...

]]> from DCI_Kristen J. Fritz
to ben@consumerist.com
date Wed, Nov 5, 2008 at 4:10 PM
subject UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

Dear Ben,

Uniqlo�s HEATTECH line of innerwear is shaking the world of fashion this month with a global promotion kicking-off November 18 from 10AM-1PM in Times Square, where a giant human vending machine will dispense free fashion to the public...

/snip/

Please let me know if you would like to receive an image of the giant human vending machine.

Best,

Kristen Fritz

from Ben Popken
to "DCI_Kristen J. Fritz"
date Thu, Nov 6, 2008 at 9:19 AM
subject Re: UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

Yes, I would like to receive an image of a giant human vending machine.

from DCI_Kristen J. Fritz
to Ben Popken
date Thu, Nov 6, 2008 at 9:35 AM
subject RE: UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

Good morning Ben,

Attached is a picture of the human vending machine. Please let me know if you have any additional questions and if you would like to join us at the event.

Best,

Kristenfrom DCI_Kristen J. Fritz
to Ben Popken
date Tue, Nov 11, 2008 at 10:52 AM
subject RE: UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

Hi Ben,

I hope you are well. I wanted to check in to see if you receive the picture of the giant human vending machine and if you had any questions at this time regarding Uniqlo�s HeatTech gifting event taking place next Tuesday, November 18 from 10am-1pm in Times Square?

I hope you are able to write about the event and the technology behind this innovative clothing line.

Best,

Kristen

from Ben Popken
to "DCI_Kristen J. Fritz"
date Thu, Nov 13, 2008 at 12:41 PM
subject Re: UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

So do humans come out of the vending machine or clothes? Do you step into the vending machine and get the clothes? If the 2nd one, are the clothes just on shelves or do they actually come out of automated devices?

from DCI_Kristen J. Fritz
to Ben Popken
date Thu, Nov 13, 2008 at 2:14 PM
subject RE: UNIQLO HEATS UP TIMES SQUARE WITH FREE HEATTECH GIVEAWAY -- Nov 18

Hi Ben! Here is a link to a video to give you a better idea of what the machines will be like at the event: http://www.voteheattech.com/video.html. People will approach a giant human vending machine and push a button for men�s or women�s clothing. Models positioned inside the machine will then execute a choreographed routine and a package of free HEATTECH innerwear will pop out.

To answer your questions below, no humans do not come out of the vending machine. Only a package of HeatTech innerwear. No, the public will not step into the vending machine to get the clothes. Once the person pushes the button for men�s or women�s clothing, package of free HEATTECH innerwear will pop out of a slot.

Comment from bagumpity on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T23:17:22Z

I thought there were giant humans who were also vending machines. For the life of me, I could not figure out where you would put the money, and I had NO desire to know where the goods came out.

Comment from Sidecutter on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T21:32:36Z

Daft Punk's 'Robot Rock' was a pleasant surprise in those vids. And a GI Joe T-shirt? Double win.

Comment from Mikestan on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T20:27:16Z

I generally avoid Time Square as if a visit might lead to me catching something but I think for a free sample from Uniqlo I might venture into dark water.

Comment from illtron on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T18:55:47Z

@SuparnaBabalas: That was sarcasm. Besides, everybody knows that real New Yorkers eat at the Olive Garden on 6th Ave.

Comment from jamar0303 on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T15:47:07Z

@TechnoDestructo: Same here in China. But if they did this at any of their Shanghai locations I'd still be lining up- free stuff is free stuff.

Comment from richcreamerybutter on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T10:02:03Z

@Nunya B: Don't be deterred by the fact it's innerwear. I own a few pieces of HeatTech and wear them constantly.

Comment from valarmorghulis on 2008-11-14

2008-11-14T05:19:53Z

@jurijuri: It's a feature...

Comment from bubbledumpster on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T04:08:49Z

@SexCpotatoes: I vote cheerleader.

Comment from juri squared on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:53:08Z

@LoriLynn: That reminds me of the genius marketing idea from BP at one of the major local summer fests. They had their typical promo tent, but behind it they parked a semi trailer they'd converted to mobile restrooms, complete with sinks and real wood doors, that were cleaned every fifteen minutes. The line was massive, the bathrooms were nice, and I got to come up with a million BP toilet jokes while waiting.

Comment from TakingItSeriously is Simon on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:50:45Z

As far as the actual publicity stunt ... after seeing the video once I wouldn't push the stupid button, and if I was forced to listen to that all day I'm afraid I'd find an axe, and smash the button so no one else could either.

Comment from jwissick on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:47:49Z

Stupid. Just stupid.

Someone has too big of a marketing budget.

Now if the Human Vending Machine actually vended Humans, I could use a few slaves.

Comment from juri squared on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:47:05Z

@illtron: Ah, but I'm betting they sell things on the intartubes!

Comment from TechnoDestructo on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:45:27Z

@illtron:

I had no idea Uniqlo was in the US at all. Pity they have to go all gimmicky here, though. In Japan they're pretty unpretentious, and that's what I like about them. They're like the Gap minus the bullshit.

Comment from TheWillow on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:38:40Z

@LoriLynn:

My favorite was last year on Dec 3 when Dewers threw a "Repeal Day" Party in honor of the anniversary of the 21st Amendment - complete with actors in raccoon coats and period dresses.

Comment from Burning pakalolo not even noticing the weather on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:34:01Z

@undefined: @illtron: Dude I dont know too many New Yorkers that eat at the Olive Garden, yuck :(

Comment from SexCpotatoes on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:32:36Z

Is the female model a former chearleader, stripper, or both?

Comment from TakingItSeriously is Simon on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T02:21:23Z

Ben thanks

One of my 2 Team-Mates who is a friend, as well as my manager just got riffed yesterday.

I think your email exchanges with the company was the brightest point of my day!

Made me smile.

Comment from LoriLynn on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:50:21Z

Am I the only one who thought the pictures she sent had very little in common with the video?

The best "gimmick" I ever saw in Times Square was when Charmin Bathroom tissue took over a building and made nice, clean, happy smelling bathrooms. You had to wait in line to get in while hearing the Charmin jingle over and over, and there were some desperate "actors" singing and dancing happy Charmin tunes. But overall? A clean bathroom in Times Square. Brilliant.

Comment from Nunya B on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:42:39Z

I think everyone involved is having a great deal of fun here, which is always great to see.

And honestly, I tithe half my money to Uniqlo anyway so it's about time I got something for free, even if the Old Navy prices and excellent quality are enough on their own most days. It's just a shame that it has to be WEIRD-ASS INNERWEAR.

Comment from chrisjames on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:38:57Z

@illtron: It's less marketing gimmick and more PR gimmick. Conspicuous public displays will get media attention, and that's the advertising angle. Due to the idiocy of the stunt, it can only happen in Times Square where the vapid tourists will gobble it up. New York wins, media wins, UNIQLO wins, humanity loses.

Comment from Preyfar on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:38:22Z

I hope to God that vending machine isn't powered by Windows. One BSOD and those models will be toast.

Comment from nevin on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:34:05Z

Can I just say though, that I've been wearing this stuff all week and it is really good. The arms are a bit loose but nothing major. It fits under my snowboard gear and generally kicks ass.

Comment from lannister80 on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:33:47Z

@illtron: Quoth wikipedia: "The opening of the Manhattan store was followed in September 2007 by the closing of UNIQLO's three New Jersey locations, leaving the count of North American stores at one."

Comment from illtron on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:21:59Z

OK, where do I begin?

1. How many Uniqlo stores in the US *are not* in New York? I know of one in New Jersey. There could be more by now. But not many more.

2. People who live in New York generally don't hang out in Times Square (except to go to the Times Square Olive Garden -- the best damn Olive Garden in the world!).

3. When New Yorkers are forced to visit Times Square, they get the hell in and get the hell out as fast as possible, avoiding whatever dumb-ass marketing gimmicks are going on at the moment.

4. Since Uniqlo is mostly in New York, and New Yorkers are mostly not in Times Square, Uniqlo is wasting their money advertising to tourists from Des Moines who will never encounter a Uniqlo store.

5. Therefore, and for more obvious reason, this is stupid.

Comment from dorianh49 on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:18:13Z

@jurijuri: there will probably be a "firmwear" fix for that shortly.

Comment from Skiffer on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T01:10:28Z

Who says the economy's in the gutter?

Not when we can still pay people to do the robot and give me free sh*t!!!

Oh wait, the dancers are being paid with thermal underwear??

Comment from Anonymous on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T00:58:07Z

"To answer your questions below, no humans do not come out of the vending machine. Only a package of HeatTech innerwear."

No humans will not come out of the vending machine? Is that to say that all human WILL come out of the vending machine, and the only thing that will not come out is a package of HeatTech innerwear? This is a fantastic marvel of engineering (although I wish I'd been consulted prior to being booked to come out of the vending machine), although I question its application to selling HeatTech innerwear.

Comment from LindsayC: doctoral hilarity ensues on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T00:57:27Z

I hoped giant humans would be sold from the vending machines. Oh well.

Comment from Raekwon on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T00:56:03Z

So if I got and push the button over and over that guy has to keep dancing the robot? Sweet!! Push push push push push push push.

Comment from juri squared on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T00:54:48Z

Sooo... you have to wait for the dance to finish to receive your sample?

Seems to me like the engineers need to work on the load time on this one!

Comment from Meg Marco on 2008-11-13

2008-11-14T00:51:44Z

I love this!