Howard Beasley is my uncle.

Hi all! Sorry I'm late to the party but this cracks me up and I had to post. Howard Beasley is my uncle. Yes, it's true. I happened to be doing an online search for my grandfather (same name) and found this website. I'll be sure to pass on all the giggles and funny remarks to him. He'll get a real kick out of some of them for sure.

He's a really great guy and funny to boot. I thought I was going to die laughing when I heard the recording.

And I like the guy's escalating frustration. He went from coming in 'two days' to 'tomorrow'.

that guy sounds like the dude from king of the hill, but the original "anderson" off of beavis and butthead.

i wish people would try this on me, i love to go off on people. but i think i'd just use my other phone to call my local FBI office, and work with them to trace the call.

I love this man.

387 comment ain't too shabby either.
i know that some people think it's taking it too far.
not when the d-bag threatens to come to your home.

He sounds like the Jimmy Dean sausage guy. Remember the one who was pissed about the 12oz. size?

Anyways the conversation seems so immature. And the guy sounds like Hank Hill from King of the Hill - I'll Tell you What'. Why not just hang up on them, I get similar calls but usually it's an energy company asking me what company I'm with and then they ask me for my account #, I know the scam - a competing energy company calls a house and then tries to get the account # - then they can unilaterally (without permission) switch you over to their service and they'll try to charge you more.

You would think they would have though this through a little bit better. Would have probably had better luck just trying to verify account information instead of telling someone, "Gee mister we accidentally just stole some money from you, is that bad?"

As always thanks for bringing these things to light most people would have just handed over the number.

Some form of "Howard Beasley" needs to become slang for owning phishers.

Anyway, that was hilarious. Reminded me of what I'd liked to do a million years ago when AOL password phishers ran rampant: promise them I would disclose my password after they provided me with their QXR number, telling them that all AOL employees have a QXR number. It was great fun the way some of them would come up with dozens of strings of random numbers, which of course I'd proclaim as wrong. Or string them along with "No, that's your AMR code, I need your QXR number."

@JohnOB1: YOUR DAUGHTER KICK MY DOG! YOU FUCKING GUY!

Funny stuff.

Would've resulted in a way shorter call and possibly less interesting one as well.

And as for skunks biting people...that's a rabies problem because skunks usually spray you away if they're healthy! I know been sprayed before. I don't recommend it. I didn't find it one bit funny! Fortunately, I was in a camping tent and the tent took most of the hit. My house has been sprayed by skunks before, too.

Too bad Howard didn't have a smell-a-phone! LOL!!

Lucky for me I live up in the great place called NoVA (Northern Virginia) :D.

He informed the caller several times he was being recorded- duh! That's all he has to do- he has no basis to sue him. The scammer could have hung up at anytime.@DoctorMD:

@RagingTowers: It's true, we're not all like that!

"I've got a .357 with your name on it"
"You don't know what 'Sue' is.. you probably think it is a girl next door."

@DoctorMD:

he told him he was recording and he doesn't need the consent as long as one party being recorded is fine with it

MeMikeYouNot: I get those all the time. Several per day. They just go right into my spam folder.

LOL I would have told him a lot worse then this southern gentleman said. The Indian on the other line would fear for his wife's honor after I spoke with him.

Howard Beasley is my new hero. Classic!!!

And yes, many people are fooled by the Southern drawl. I deal with it all the time. Not sure if someone in India would think so but it's fun to think they thought he would be an easy mark.

Of course, I don't know if people in India hold that assumption but it's more fun to think the scammer thought he had an easy mark.

They'll drop their curry and hang up in a big hurry.

Also emailing back Nigerian scammers is LOADS of fun.

WTF is the "United States Banking Commission" supposed to be anyhow? Man, is the FDIC gonna be mad when they find out there's someone else out there muscleing in on their gig.

Geez I can't belief the scammer stayed on the line that long arguing with him. It was obvious early on he wasn't going to get anywhere.

I got the same exact kind of call from someone with a very similar sounding voice, except my call really was from a guy with the United States Banking Commission. Luckily, I had my checking account number handy so that I could get my money back!

Look forward to the day when I can turn off the mail aliases.

[www.419eater.com]

Sorry, it's the best I could find, but the Q's reminded me of it.

Great show... SNL and the PCSB.

Scammer: What's your account number?
Me: 8765-9983-1873-5836-3846-0017-3388-9374-QQQQ-1088 etc...

Start here: [en.wikipedia.org]

Also this guy sounds like one of the Touchstone Terrorist characters.

Wait, shouldn't the scammer be a rat?

*fails to find song regarding fairs being smorgesboards (sp?) on YouTube*

He sounds like Forrest Gump, and he does have the same euphisms as him too

[consumerist.com]

Dear "redacted"

My name is Andrey Kashtanov.
As Dream House, LCC's top manager I am in charge of our performance
control
and further business development in the US. I am also involved in advising

and attracting new employees. I have reviewed your resume and
believe you have a good chance to receive the position of a Financial
Manager.
Please, read below for more information on our company.

Our company deals in design activity.
We are engaged in project generation of buildings and design of rooms:
- accommodations
- premises
Dream House, LCC started its activity in 1998 and we have customers all
over the world.
For more information please visit the official website of the company:
www.dreamhouselcc.com
Dream House, LCC is located in Moscow, Russia.
Dream House, LCC started its activity in the US market in 2008.
We waged a great advertising campaign and now we have a great number of
American customers,
who are ready to come into line with us.
We get the jump on American design companies:
1. The cost of our service is much lower.
2. Professionals of a wealth of experience work in our company.
That's why we fill the orders professionally and quickly.

But we faced the problem because the US law does not allow doing trade
business in the USA for the following reasons:

The first problem:
All financial services have to take place only in the country.
The customer is not in a position to effect payments for the company that
have no offices in the USA.

Our company is located in Russia that is why the customers are not able to
transfer money directly to Russia.
Under the US law funds must be transferred on the account of the Financial
Manager that is a citizen of the USA.
That is the Financial Manager who is entitled to transfer funds to
Russia.

The second problem: solved
Our company has to be registered in the US tax administration. The company
has already met this condition.
You can fully learn this information from our official website.

Therefore now the employee in the USA is necessary for us and now I want
to offer you this post.
WE ACCEPT WIRE TRANSFER FOR PAYMENT OF OUR SERVICES.
THEREFORE ONE OF THE DUTIES OF THE US FINANCIAL MANAGER IN THE USA.
Also I want to explain to you a situation concerning payment of taxes.
You should not worry concerning payment of taxes from your incomes.
Because you should not pay any taxes from your incomes as you will be
submitted as
" Independent Contractor " and according to the contract which
you sign with our company,
you will be exempted from all taxes.

1. JOB DESCRIPTION
We are looking for a Financial Manager. MAIN DUTIES INCLUDE RECEIVING
PAYMENTS FROM CUSTOMERS.

2. COMPENSATION
Financial Manager will be entitled to 5% of all completed transaction.
The maximum turnover handled by a single manager is limited
by company's policy and is set at $200,000.
Thus the maximum monthly pay will constitute $5,000-10,000.

3. TYPE OF EMPLOYMENT
Agreement

4. TIME COMMITMENT
2-5 hours a week

IMPORTANT
We also have a business proposal for US company owners and managing
directors.
Private US businesses can accept funds from our customers with no
limitations
with a monthly turnover of up to 1 million US dollars.
Their profit is set at 5% of the turnover and may constitute $200,000
monthly.
Please apply if you have a legal running business and interested in this
offer.

A sample of your Employment Agreement will be enclosed in my next e-mail.

Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions.

Yours faithfully,
Personal Manager
Andrey Kashtanov
Work e-mail: kashtanov@dreamhouselcc.com
Personal e-mail: kashtanov.dreamhouse@gmail.com

Yeah, howard should totally have assumed different identities throughout the call. "I am from the FBI!".

Five minutes later"
"Do you know who I am? I'm Cher's hairdresser, damnit! YOU CAN'T SPEAK TO CHER'S HAIRDRESSER LIKE THAT."

And on and on.

Scammer: Hello, my name is Tim Roberts calling about refunding you some money.

Me: Tim Roberts - Wow, what a stoke of luck - I'm with City Financial and we have a little of $800 we need to you. Can you verify your account information for me.

Scammer: What? I'm suppose to be scamming you.

Me: This is no scam Tim, you know if you give me your credit card number along with the pin number, I will be able to put back the $800 tonight.

Scammer: hangs up....

Would have been infinately better if he put the guy on hold, called the FBI and conferenced in the scammer. He probably would easily have gotten an early morning tv segment out of this.

Think about it... every time you call Dell, AT&T, etc... and get Tarbash in Bangalore, he's a button press away from your name, address, phone #, Social Security #, possibly credit card #, etc....

My sister in law works for the FBI and from what I gather at our holiday dinners, there's a VERY large and increasing number of identity theft & white collar crime cases originating from India.

So the question is: when is "cheap" not really so "cheap"?

As long as corporate America is ruled by the almighty dollar, American consumers and workers are lambs for slaughter.

@scoosdad: I think it may also be easier to record the conversation into a useful format using your computer.

He should've told the scammer he was part of the FBI.

@scoosdad:

VoIP affects this because the rates for VoIP service are substantially lower than rates for standard telephone service. Overseas calls via VoIP are pennies per minute compared to the dollars per minute standard calls can be, which, if a scammer has a high enough hit rate, is worth the price.

@DoctorMD:

Howard Beasley told the caller he was being recorded, but the man didn't hang up.

Um, no. And it depends on the state, but I'm too lazy to look that up since it's already been answered.

We're pretending she's a turkey or a goose or something like that.

That one went right over my head. Why are we pretending she's poultry?

Why don't I get phone calls like this? I'd LOVE to mess with this guy!

There should be a decimal in .357, ya'll. [/pedantic]

This rocks, this scam will only work if you dont balance your check book and view your checking account on a daily basis. Priceless. "I have a 357. I'll put your name on it"
awesome!!

Scammer with accent is from the United States Banking Commission. Fucking classic.

I had no idea these people were so persistent.

I can imagine this tactic - which seems childish here - is extremely effective on the elderly.

I love this so much.