I think its a note to the kitchen staff that these people are assholes. Tells the kitchen staff to add the special stuff to the food.

Except I'll bet that the server didn't get a tip because it's not as common to tip in the U.K. But he sure as hell didn't deserve one, even if this had taken place in the U.S.! For all the complaining everyone does about tipping, it is nice to have the ability to tell your extremelly rude server "FU!"

;-)

They should come to the Weiner Circle in Chicago if they visit the states. They'd probably leaving thinking this bill was cordial service.

...they're very welcome to come back and have a free meal and we'd like them to.

See, this is where the free/discount compensation doesn't work. "Hey, how 'bout we don't charge you next time? I'm sure it won't be full of spit..."

On a related note, I agree with everyone who is remarking on the price of the food. Eating in the U.K. was heart-stoppingly expensive. The only way I could stomach it was to pretend the £ were $ (and that I wasn't really paying double that). Ouch.

@inno: @wideawake: I think the meatball starter was ordered thrice, so it was a slightly less horrible £5.95 each.

I thank the Maker for the 6 months I spent bussing tables in my youth. Thanks to that experience, no job I take after that will be the worst job I ever had. I blame my general disdain of all humans to that job, as well.

This receipt just says in writing what I said in my head (and under my breath) time and time again when I had that job.

The problem, is that this person's dainty feelings were hurt and somebody said a bad word at them. because of this, it is now the obligation of the business owner to shower them with apologies and free swag so that they don't call a lawyer and sue them for sexual harassment or defamation of character, or for making them feel bad about them selves.

I think a better solution is to maybe never go back to the restaurant? or else demand that they be given the suck dick fuck face if they are going to be charged for it.

This means only one thing: time for road trip to Great Britain!!

Although, we're too classy to list it on the bill so blatantly. "Producer's fee" works better than others.

hahahaha

Downside to the story is the wire operator inputted it on the confirm because they were were literally not paid to think but to just input what the brokers had written down. Yup, the client got the confirmation with the note and the broker got fired. The manager that signed off on the ticket (who really didn't even glance at it didn't get as much as an oily hair tussled over it). So it's not just crappy restaurants these messages get sent around and accidentally put on tickets.....needless to say, we were all VERY careful with our messages to each other.

Then there are the horror stories of what happens when the MUTE button on the headsets don't work. icky.

@gatopeligroso: Obviously you have never worked in a restaurant. It's the most obnoxious (but kind of awesome) work environment imaginable. That language is common in the back of every restaurant you have eaten at. Promise.

And doesn't fish cakes sound totally disgusting? I'm more offended by that and I always will be!

I don't think I'll be eating there any time soon.

Of course, it was free. On the flip side, I dunno that you could go back there. They are SO TOTALLY going to do something GROSS to your food.

/fuckface ftw

I would order that one every time -- just to run it through expense approvals.

Um, could we maybe put this behind a NSFW link?

I'll bet it was the waiter telling the cook "Suck my dick, fuck face." At the one restaurant I worked at, there were tremendous battles between the waiters and the kitchen staff. Once a waiter actually dragged one of the cooks out through the dining room and threw her in the gutter in front of the place.

I worked in escrow closing with a guy who could fart at will. Obnoxious buyers' attorneys got the gastrointestinal equivalent of this...all over their HUD-1 forms. Great fun.

@wordsmithy:
No, a lot of people use girls/boys to mean male/female. It's to do with gender, not age.

...booked the table for 8 o' clock...we didn't actually receive our food until quarter past 10...

Did they, by any chance, spend the 2+ hrs bitching to every employee that came within 10 feet of them? Hence the "suck my dick fuckface" label for the table in question?

I think the bill is funny, and while I might have pointed it out to a manager or the owner, I wouldn't have gotten upset about it.

@jkaufman101: Just follow the link to the original BBC story - the restaurant name is right there. If you google it, you can find the restaurant's web site.

No one's offended that the owner refers to presumably adult women as "girls"?

Beyond the receipt... it took 45 minutes from their reservation time to get their order taken? And then another hour and a half to get their food? I'm amazed thse folks stuck around long enough to even get this receipt! "Ma'am, would you like some written abuse to go with your starvation?"

...and so ended Billy Ripken's career as a waiter.

I think it's pretty amazing that it was free....maybe they should have pointed out to the server that they put an item on their for no charge, and they usually have to pay for that.....

That reminds me of a receipt I got from the grocery store once. The receipts would always say, "Your checker is...!" and then it would have the name of the checker in all caps. So once I got a checker who had a name that made that situation amusing. My receipt said, "Your checker is GAY!"

holy crap! they spent 73 pounds on alcohol!!! I hope it was a big party.

Written apology? Compensation? I don't see how that could possibly be enough for the trauma you've been through tonight. Clearly this person was a true fuckface and deserved to be referred to as such.

Common mistake, the keys are right next to each other.

Too bad she wasn't charged $2,242.00 for it!

Oh yeah, the nasty comment is sucky too.

Well, at least the wine included VAT

I'm seeing it as a comment from the waitstaff to the kitchen. It doesn't have anything to do with the customer. It was just them insulting each other in a novel way, and the customer just happened to accidentally be let in on the (hopefully) joke. Yes it's a serious screw-up, but I don't see that the intent was to insult or offend the customer.

@clevershark: Um, I was thinking the same thing. Rather than blame it on a pissed off watier, he's actually admitting that this is common practice in his restaurant? It's just that they usually remove the rude comments before the bill is given to the customer? WTF?

@clevershark: Damn! You beat me to it!!

But that is basically the truth. Why have that as a menu item in the computer?

Lol, it wasn't supposed to be viewed by the customer's but it was supposed to be viewed by the kitchen staff... Interesting

"Absolutely disgusting language." Agreed. Who in the hell would put a fish in a cake?

The guy might as well say "that's what we say about all our patrons, just not to their faces".