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NO FLUX CAPACITORS!?!?! THIS LIST IS BS.
NO FLUX CAPACITORS!?!?! THIS LIST IS BS.
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Salt. you can use it to preserve meats, season your food, and de-ice your driveway
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why isn't the iPhone on here?
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1+2 = elementary school science fair volcano... shouldn't that be on the list then?
I don't know aboout #5. I've been using ms notepad for taking notes for years -- I don't need some kind of new-fangled 'pen' thingy to do that stuff
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Furniture. Great for sleeping on, sitting in, and having somewhere soft to put our high fructose corn syrup laden bodies. Also makes great firewood when done sitting on.
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Alcohol! The cause of AND solution to all of life's problems.
Slow news day?
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I'm still waiting for the \"Top 10 Lists\" list. It's coming. You watch.
You people are weird.
Oh, and I totally disagree with #9. Now, pay me.
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@Sudonum: And sow your neighbor's yard with salt in retribution! (For what? MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA!)
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#1 Lead... used for poisoning animals, poisoning children, poisoning parents of children, making poison more poisonous AND protecting your nuts from x-rays!
I have no quibbles with this fantastic list. You guys nailed it!
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plastic is useful for making durable, lightweight, inexpensive products like buckets, bags, and plates.
No Turducken? WTF?
I guess #9 is true after all.
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Novelty T-Shirts.
They always have the perfect pun, should I faulter.
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Um, coffee has calories, though I'm not sure how many. How do I know? Well, mold won't grow without something to eat...
(I'll let you figure out the reat...)
if you put \"Comcast\" in front of any of these items, they instantly become turds!
I'm so glad you included olive oil - it is my cooking best friend.
I was a little shocked over the fact that my husband's snobby sister used vegetable oil to cook chicken... bleh.
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I have lost all respect for this site. How could you even BEGIN to list the spork as a good invention. It's a spoon and a fork, but like it's name it's not quite good at either of them. In fact it sucks as a spoon because it's too shallow and it sucks as a fork because the prongs are too small.
One thing you didn't mention about baking soda: mixed with water, it is the absolute best short-term acid reflux and heartburn remedy available!
Maybe that bumps it up on the list?
@Roadkill: This is so true. The spork need a major re-engineering, with longer tines, a deeper bowl AND to make it the ultimate utensil, a knife edge on the left edge of the spork.
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Duct tape and zip ties.
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NO! Vinegar and Baking Soda should not be on that list. When you combine the two, they foam! And foam means rabies!!!!
Good job on the spork though. It's better than a foon, which is basically a curvy spatula.
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And don't forget the #1 use for the #1 winner: douching!
@pegr:
Tea and coffee have approximately 2 Calories per cup, obviously that's before you add anything. So I think you can consider them effectively calorie free. like diet sodas. But as Tank points out dihydrogen monoxide is great and completely calorie free.
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must be a slow news day
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Chocolate.
Why? Because it can help you get laid.
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I would add toilets. There are just not enough good things I could say about that invention.
@cwalters: To everyone: PLEASE don't take that as an invitation to write similar insult-comments, or Ben and Meghann will tan my hide.
Glue. Good for sniffing, eating, and sticking things together.
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The movement toward poptop lids on soup cans. If your opener has ever lost its teeth gripping ability mid use on a tasty can of soup, you know I'm right.
Duct tape and WD40. If it sticks and it shouldn't, use WD40. If it moves and it shouldn't, use duct tape.
That is ALL one needs.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-192593-100x100.png\")
Tampons...half of us don't use them, but for the other half (including me), they're pretty indispensable.
Diapers: great for long roadtrips!
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@cwalters: [Grammar Nazi Comment]! [Disparaging remark about sloppy editing that contains a typo and misused apostrophe]. [Hostile disagreement with list items]!!!
[Random insult thrown at someone earlier on the list for disagreement]!
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Perfect! Although I must point out that olive oil can act as an air freshener, too, so it should be much higher on the list.
Your forgot a bunch of good ones...
What about THE COTTEN JEN, THE WATER WHEEL AND MILL, Hell, THE WHEEL IN GENERAL, EVEN LITTLE WIMPY PEOPLE CAN MAKE HEAVY LOADS GO LONG DISTANCES...
WOW! That was like such a maximum waste of time I'm actually going to spend MORE time commenting not on how LITTLE that article contributed to my day BUT INSTEAD TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS ABOUT THE FACT THAT IT WAS A TOTAL *ZERO!*
Thanks Lifehacker for cross-posting this completely mind-numbed bag of electrons.
No, don't stop smoking pot for our sakes!
Love,
Your loyal readers!
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We should add CORN. Corn and its by-products are in basically everything (i.e. it's an ingredient in envelope glue). People who have corn allergies practically have to live like the Amish. I've seen it. It's positively scary.
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I had much higher hopes reading the headline. C'mon guys, did this take you five minutes to write at the bar last night? You are usually so great, I waisted 2 minutes reading this, and I want them back.
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@Tank: I swear to god, if one more idiot makes that stupid attempt at a joke... It's not funny or clever and you are far from the fist person with internet access and a below average IQ to try it. You are exactly why #9 should be replaced with salt.
*first, not fist
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Walls. I would have voted for walls as they actually CREATE spaces. There would be no inside, no outside without walls.
You missed one of the most revolutionary technologies out there: string (of all materials and thickness) and its offshoot fabric.
Water! You can grow plants with it, consume it for nutritional purposes, or even wash your car. It's free at most restaurants, and available in many places through water fountains. Even when it's dirty and nasty it can be easily cleaned and reclaimed through distillation or filtering. Plus it has no clickwrap EULAs or usage restrictions, and is almost always available without signing a mandatory binding arbitration agreement!
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@JUST_PARANOID
I thought it was funny.
Oh, you guys forgot one. Windows Vista
@mavrc:
No, no, NO!!! Not dihydrogen monoxide! It's used in nuclear reactors, part of the styrofoam manufacturing process, and causes landscape erosion!!
This ranks #1 in my blog of the top 10, top 10 lists of the year.
The internet should be number 1, because without it I would have no idea what to do with vinegar, olive oil, and/or ladders.
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you forgot fire!! i use it to heat my home and cook my food. if i don't like them i BURN THEM!!!
also you forgot air. don't beleve me? watch this infomercial.
Ya forgot clothing! Not only does it prevent freezing in the winter, but it also prevents the sheriff's deputies from arresting you for indecent exposure.
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No booze?! Are you guys sure that you're over the age of - what - nine?!!
(And, no, I won't even bring up the \"invention\" of - err - self-pleasuring. Because that would only confirm my suspicion that the Consumerist offices come complete with a nap room and a rack for holding sippy cups.)
@ GREASY THUMB GUZIK
Weirdly enough, that was my first thought as well. It's quite an all-purpose machine.
A knife edge on the left side of a spork? Food that tastes like copper anyone?
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b o r a x
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Thank you for ranking shoes and olive oil higher than the internet!