![\"user-pic\"](\"/css/images/default.gif\")
I'll cheer that response. Well written Ms. Walker!
I'll cheer that response. Well written Ms. Walker!
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-84922-100x100.png\")
That's fantastic. It's not often that you actually see a sense of humor come out of corporate correspondence.
They should have sent him a free sharpie, just in case he wins the next round.
Kudos Ms. Walker.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-56672-100x100.png\")
FANTASTIC.
Autumn Walker, I applaud you.
Totally made me grin on a rather bummy afternoon. Go Ms. Walker. I knew I loved Amazon for a reason. Now if they'd only get me the Two Fat Ladies DVD collection in Region 1 encoding, I would be totally devoted.
Awesome. I need to save this somewhere for when I next need a good laugh.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-172388-100x100.png\")
Love it.
Heh heh. This reminds me of the Miller beer \"shotgunning\" letter.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-5552-100x100.png\")
Bravo, Amazon.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-188304-100x100.png\")
lol thats a great reply. im glad they did reply but i must offer a warning. people keep on sending letters like this to executive customer service and sooner or later it will be manned by the same that currently handle regular customer service. let this be a diamond in the rough.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-257922-100x100.png\")
Amazon.com - Proof that good service can indeed come both cheap and fast.
Wow, I wish all customer support emails were written with such correct vocabulary and spelling. Most of the time, you feel like a 3rd grader is replying to you.
brilliant
Ah... witty banter. I love it when intelligent people collide!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-185231-100x100.png\")
Awesome response, but I have to say the original letter made me laugh more!
Pure Hilarity!
I'm surprised they didn't send him a free sharpie or a sharpie and a writing pad. They could have just thrown a couple of office supplies in an envelope.
What a whiner... You didn't get a laptop on sale for an amazing price, and now you're upset and pretending to let it destroy your life?
Not only are your thoughts of statistics flawed (that one of 18 gathered, some should have been selected), but fundamentally beyond reason. It is not \"practically a statistical impossibility\" as you say. I can't find the numbers or a citation right now, but I took a gambling based statistics class that noted once in monte carlo, there has been a roulette roll of 30-ish consecutive color spins (as in all red or all black). Shocking as it may sound, a group did an analysis and found that the result fell in directly into the estimated probability of it actually happening based on the number of spins at the casino since it was built.
to add/restate my original post---i don't see the humor involved and the original poster comes across as a sore loser. Sure, the response from amazon was nice and funny, but I totally miss the purpose of the original message sent to amazon, except to whine and hope to get something for nothing.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-64499-100x100.png\")
Nice read!
lol that's awesome!
@crnk:
While all these things you state are true, at least the OP and Amazon understand this wonderful thing called, um, sarcasm. Please don't tell me you really didn't understand that this was a joke, and that the OP was in NO WAY claiming that he'd been wronged?
![\"user-pic\"](\"/mt-static/support/assets_c/userpics/userpic-118612-100x100.png\")
@crnk:
humor, meet CRNK,
CRNK, meet humor
I don't know what you're talking about. The original letter made me smile.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-115122-100x100.png\")
In cas any one else was wondering
vociferous
vo·cif·er·ous
1. crying out noisily; clamorous.
2. characterized by or uttered with vociferation: a vociferous manner of expression
You know that you all had to look it up too!
Autumn Walker, will you marry me?
wonderful!
This is why I love Amazon's customer service. The only time I've called their customer support was for a mp3 download that didn't download. I explained my situation to the CSR. He said, \"So, basically you purchased a mp3, it didn't download, and now you're S.O.L. Cool, I can fix that.\"
Real people are such a refreshing alternative to drones. Still, I suspect that if Hildebrandt's original email had even a shred of reality to it, the response would have been slightly less eloquent.
@crnk: Are you serious? I hate to be the one to burst the bubble but the poster was making fun of similar, but completely serious, threads on the Amazon forum.
As for the Amazon response, the best part is I eagerly await the publication of your novel, and can assure you that I will be among the earliest purchasers at the bookstore.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-86677-100x100.png\")
@Hawk07: I agree. The least that letter deserves is a sharpie, a pen, and a legal pad.
@crnk: Lookup Sarcasm in a dictionary....
Besides, he wasn't looking to get something for nothing. He was trying to get a 1000 dollar laptop at the displayed price of 229 + shipping + \"price of writing a funny letter to amuse anyone who has a sense of humor who read it\"
Those are hilarious. CRNK...time to get your sarcasm/humor meter calibrated.
I'm sure CRNK is just being sarcastic, him/herself, right? Right? Oh.
I'm a long-time Amazon customer and this just reminded me that I should continue to go to them first or second when seeking . . . just about everything!
@charles star: good eye. I missed that. Ha!
@crnk:
Thank you for your interest in my e-mail. I would like to assure you that while I did not take any statistics classes during my illustrious post-secondary education, my e-mail was based on the reported findings of many forum members on Amazon.com. While this may not be as reputable as those found in, say, the New England Journal of Medicine, I believe this random sampling of forum members was more than qualified to make these claims. Funny that you are unable to cite your sources (\"I can't find the numbers or a citation right now\"), while I am able to link to an entire forum of people who will confirm my findings (\"OMG AMAZON IS HOARDING MAH LAPTOPS!!!\").
I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's okay to laugh sometimes.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-159466-100x100.png\")
Haha, that was great. I love writing totally sarcastic emails like this and seeing what kind of response I get. One time I applied to be on that show \"Hell's Kitchen\" because my gf was watching it and I thought the guy was a joke and then I saw an ad for it on CL. So I wrote about how I can follow the back of a kraft dinner box with the best of them and that I had as of yet never burnt a bowl of cereal, and they wrote me back with a very enthusiastic response about why I should come to an audition and everything and actually harassed me for several days with phone calls as well. If you want to be on reality TV, take note; be as insane as possible, because it makes great television.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-203062-100x100.png\")
hilarious, but i still dont think jeff bezos read it. I'm not important and i just barely made it through.
@trujunglist: The way American TV portrays Gordon Ramsay he is a joke, the way he handles himself and runs his business is not. I've eaten in his place in London...the turnover at his restaurants is under 10% in an industry where the churn rate is generally measured with the same Fujita scale used to measure tornados.
If you put together a kitchen full of morons and have them run a 4-6 hour dinner service, you'll be sure to get 4-6 minutes of someone who is used to working with professionals (and some of the top people in the industry) blowing up at the morans out of it.
In the UK Hells Kitchen was him taking a bunch of celebrities and making them into chefs...THAT would be so much more fun :)
reg
An outstanding response to a whiny complaint!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-25844-100x100.png\")
LOL that was great. Good job(s) Hildebrandt and Walker.
LOVE LOVE LOVE AMAZON (even if they sell vibrators with sharp edges)!!!!!!
Random story this reminded me of: years ago, I saw a magazine ad from some musical instrument company, that showed a drummer dissing his guitarist. This sort of irked me (being a guitarist), so I mailed the company a completely ridiculous/humorous (CRNK wouldn't get it) rant of a guitarist dissing a drummer. I wasn't expecting a reply, but apparently it amused some people in the company because they mailed me a free T-shirt! Which I gave to my drummer. :-)
I don't know about Amazon specifically, but I think in general a company whose employees have a sense of humor are going to do better in the long run.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-72627-100x100.png\")
@j-yo: Dude. The complaint wasn't whiny, it was a joke. Which the responder understood, and replied in kind, thus warranting a posting by Consumerist. Which is the current website you are on. Which I thought I might point out because your reading comprehension seems to be a little, well, crappy.
That is a clever response, but I declare that LAME. A customer takes so much time and effort to write a request like that, and puts all that 'effort' into doing a really, really good job of requesting, and they shoot it down?
LAME. Tell me the company doesn't have one extra model of that laptop that they can write off a sale price on a 251st laptop.
Amazon has some other very questionable money-specific issues, such as claiming that they don't validate purchases on mispriced items \"due to the large number of items\" they sell.
How does the number of items they sell make them not responsible for their mistakes? And they can't write off one more sale, and for a high-hit blogger no less? Giving him his laptop would net a huge amount of positive publicity, and for dirt cheap. Shame on Amazon.
It's great that Amazon has a sense of humor, but come on. Customer service is slow enough as it is, we don't need prank emails (and responding to these pranks) further delaying response times.
haha that was great. props
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-3241-100x100.png\")
\"Take heart; Norman Mailer wrote all of his novels by hand.\"
Yeah, but Norman Mailer's dead. Is it just me or is Autumn Walker wishing death on A. Hildebrandt? What a cunt.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-88882-100x100.png\")
Autumn Walker. Cute.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-12988-100x100.png\")
Well played Ms.Walker, well played.
@EtherealStrife: I odn't think Autumn Walker of Jeff Bezos are the ones attending to customer complaints. I think response times are safe for now.
How about this,
I sent an Email to Jeff Bezos in regards to them not including the Black Friday Wii extras I was supposed to receive with my Black Friday purchase.
\"\"Dear Mr. Pautin,
My name is Peg Anderson of Amazon.com's Executive Customer
Relations. I am writing in response to a complaint filed on your
behalf by the Better Business Bureau (BBB) and your e-mail to Jeff
Bezos. I am including agents of the BBB and Jeff's office in this
correspondence for their reference.
I sympathize with your frustration. The information provided in our
previous message regarding the Wii console offered during the Black
Friday Sale states our policy at this time.
I understand that you ordered your item from Amazon.com and not an
Amazon.com merchant.
For a brief window on Nov. 22 when the product was listed on our
website as out-of-stock, the product description also included the
extra items that you mention. However, we revised the product
description when Amazon.com started to offer a different variation
of the Wii for our Black Friday Sale.
Some merchants on the Amazon.com website may still have had product
descriptions that included the extra items, but again, these were
referring to the merchant's offering. The Wii that you received
correctly matches the item sold by Amazon.com for our Black Friday
Sale.
I'm unable accommodate your request to ship the extra items or
refund you, and unfortunately, I can't offer any additional insight
or action.
We greatly appreciate your business and hope you'll give us the
opportunity to serve you again in the future. And of course, we do
hope that you enjoy the Wii you received.
Regards,
Peg Anderson
Executive Customer Relations\"
My Last name is Autin.... So, Someone else on the forum then posted the response they got from Executive Customer Relations
Dear Mr. Pautin,
My name is Brett O'Keefe of Amazon.com's Executive Customer
Relations. I am writing in response to a fax that was received by
our Legal department.
I sympathize with your frustration. The information provided in our
previous message regarding the Wii console offered during the Black
Friday Sale states our policy at this time.
I understand that you ordered your item from Amazon.com and not an
Amazon.com merchant.
For a brief window on Nov. 22 when the product was listed on our
website as out-of-stock, the product description also included the
extra items that you mention. However, we revised the product
description when Amazon.com started to offer a different variation
of the Wii for our Black Friday Sale.
Some merchants on the Amazon.com website may still have had product
descriptions that included the extra items, but again, these were
referring to the merchant's offering. The Wii that you received
correctly matches the item sold by Amazon.com for our Black Friday
Sale.
I'm unable accommodate your request to ship the extra items or
refund you, and unfortunately, I can't offer any additional insight
or action.
We greatly appreciate your business and hope you'll give us the
opportunity to serve you again in the future. And of course, we do
hope that you enjoy the Wii you received.
Regards,
Brett M O'Keefe
Executive Customer Relations
Amazon.com
[www.amazon.com]
.................................LAME..................
So I think all of their responses are prewritten they just copy and paste then change the Last name.... for more on this check out the forum on Amazon
@cibbomatteo: mmmm so what? that email is clear and concise as to what happened. should they rewrite it for every person inquiring about the same issue?
@cibbomatteo: I'm shocked to learn they would use copy and paste to respond to multiple customers with the exact same problem. Clearly they don't care...
@rjhiggins: Seriously. When handling an issue that affects multiple customers, the least they could do learn a little bit about the customer and write a personalized letter, perhaps with a customized joke based on each customer's purchase history. I mean, how dare they try to make the process efficient and try to get out a clear, concise message to as many affected customers as possible?
@spinachdip: What? Someone on Consumerist suggesting that a stranger should look at a customer's private purchasing history?!
@CIBBOMATTEO: Maybe they thought you hadn't read it the first time...?
@EATINGSTEAK: What kind of sense would it make for them to give a writer a greatly reduced in price laptop because they had written something clever. They would have then had to give the same deal to every other person requesting the same. That just wouldn't have been good business sense. There may have been lots of good publicity, but there also would have been people requesting the deal. By the CSR taking the time to write a witty response, they've gained some good publicity and avoided having to give a lot of people cheap laptops.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-75591-100x100.png\")
Heh. This place cracks me up. Just as much for the curmudgeony people who get bent out of shape as for the people who then knock said curmudgeons down a peg.
that is so awesome. fo real; amazon just gained some serious street cred with me. but wait; providing great customer service actually gets you better customers? what? when did this happen? because surely corporate america would have caught on. but instead they provide crappy customer service! its almost like they are idiots!
People always say, \"If it was my job, I would've [insert witty and/or morally uplifting remark here]\". Thank you, Autumn Walker, for being a real person and doing just that.
Hildebrandt, you rock too!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-120832-100x100.png\")
LOL AWESOME. Amazon should give that employee a raise.
\"Autumn Walker\" = the name of a song by Jets to Brazil. While I applaud the author's humor, I don't appreciate his use of anonyminity (sic).
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-92981-100x100.png\")
My feet may be blocks of ice at the moment, but reading this warmed my heart. There is hope yet for consumers!
Everyone who applauds Autumn Walker, or decries her anonymity - I write so-called corporate correspondence for a living and I'm sure if the representative's real name were attached, they would be looking for a new job.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-121677-100x100.png\")
@JudgeIto: Because everybody knows that if it's the name of a song by an obscure band, it can't be a person's real name.
I thought the same thing last year.. I actually won a Nintendo Wii this year (seriously). Let me tell you how suprised I was. I was going to keep it, but they were going for so much money on eBay I couldn't resist.
Amazon rules. I'm sure Amazon is giving Autumn a pat on the back for this one. I sure like Amazon more after reading this.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-143257-100x100.png\")
When you have a million customers (which even a small percentage is still a large amount) are you really going to want to personally write back a different reply to each person? If both people had the same problem with the Wii accessories, if the email is clear and precise on what needs to be said, why WOULD it be changed for someone else with the same problem? It is called saving time, and I figure that email was fairly clear enough regarding their policy about the Black Friday Wii Sale - We've learned to interpret copy/paste responses as uncaring/distant, but sometimes, they are going to do it because it is cost effective, and WHY NOT if the email is good enough. Sure it could handle a little more personalization but I don't think they should be made out to be so horrible just because of that. I've always had a GREAT history with Amazon and Amazon Customer Service... Because anytime I have had a problem, It has been resolved.
This guys email wasn't about a problem, it was a joke. I understand that, however, it represents many others who surely have emailed amazon trying to get something for nothing. Theres a difference between getting what you deserve (if there were 250 of them and you weren't part of the random selection, well, deal with it, its not Amazons fault, you aren't entitled to the deal.) and getting more than what you deserve, or something for nothing.
Bad customer service -> lost customers.
Good customer service -> abusive customers.
Sometimes even for the companies it seems like a lose-lose. We as consumers need to learn where the line is for asking for something.
Though I am glad that Amazon has a sense of humor regarding the cheeky email, it was truly a well written waste of time, wasn't it? And what if they had offered the laptop to him despite it being a joke? Sure thats great customer service, but really they should have no obligation no matter how well the email was written or how funny the customer is. I do commend them for their response however.
ha.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-53106-100x100.png\")
You should definitely keep up the correspondence with Autumn at Amazon. Before you know it you will both have enough material to publish an entire collection of witty and highbrow zingers. This work would only be rivaled by such publications as the published correspondences between Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud, Einstein and Leibniz, etc. Respected minds around the world would enjoy this work with overpriced cheese and Cabernet and chortle in sanctimonious glee.
I think you should send Autumn periodic \"updates\" of your novel.
I am an x amazon.com employee and I know autumn personally. She is one of the best this company has when it was comes to customer service and one of the sweetest and most all around great person i know.. you are lucky she got the email..
@zymase: we use our real names, if we gave a customer \"fake\" names that is when we would be looking for a new job. not the other way around.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-194114-100x100.png\")
That response is priceless! I've had nothing but great service from Amazon. Speaking of, I'm sitting here now waiting for UPS for my new camera from Amazon :)
Autumn Winter is a real person. I confirmed it with with a friend who is an employee at Amazon.com. This letter and the link at Consumerist is doing the rounds at Amazon today.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-220845-100x100.png\")
This actually made me grin from ear to ear. Here's to great customer service!
You know, given the humor and cleverness of her response, Ms. Walker might have a shot at that novel thing. I love companies with a sense of humor.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-19238-100x100.png\")
\"Essentially, they had several awesome items at insane prices, and people were randomly selected to get these details.\"
Why does he keep saying 'details.' Wouldn't it make more sense to call them deals?
Its too bad more corporations can't have a good sense of humor like this. The fact that someone actually took the time to read the initial e-mail, and respond (however sarcastic that response may be) gives me an idea that Amazon actually cares about their customers. Great story!
My job is answering high level complaints for a major corporation. Autumn exhibited a level of humor and sarcasm that I, sadly, am not allowed to enjoy, so I am living vicariously through her at this moment. Sadly, I am also very rarely the recipient of such a witty complaint. I will be giggling at work tomorrow thanks to this.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-59988-100x100.png\")
There must be more of this. Not less. MORE! Damn you corporations, if you all start to seem... human... it will be harder for me to hate you!!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-18347-100x100.png\")
I know the wonderful Autumn Walker personally. Her husband linked me to this story this morning and I assure all of you that not only is she a real person but she is just as sparkling, intelligent and funny in person as the letter would leave you to believe. I will tell you she is married and has a lovely baby daughter, so even though I'm sure she's flattered by the proposals she won't be able to accept. It's not unsual for her to respond to funny well-written letters in-kind (it was far more common and acceptable in Amazon's early days) and I've seen several examples of the more enteraining correspondence. I'm just glad some other people get the chance to enjoy it too. Cheers!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-214008-100x100.png\")
HUZZAH!
Well done! I think Autumn deserves a prize!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-6201-100x100.png\")
Marry me Autumn Walker, you saucy minx, you!
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-228782-100x100.png\")
And that's why we buy stuff from Amazon.
You know other than the great service, the low prices (even if i'm gonna whine about the tax) the fast shipping, and the feeling that i am greaaing the palms of good little Seattleites.
![\"user-pic\"](\"http://consumerist.com/assets_c/userpics/userpic-122043-100x100.png\")
that is so great, I wish more places had a sense of humor